130 result(s) for Norm Peterson Quotes.
"You can't put a price on friendship! But if you could, I would give you two bucks!"
"I’m not a doctor, but I have a degree in psychology. That’s practically the same thing."
"Life is not a game of chance. It is about choices. Choose wisely."
"Sometimes the answer to life’s problems is simply a cold beer and some good friends."
"I can’t believe I’m the most responsible person in this room. That is terrifying!"
"Winners finish first, and losers get to drink beer."
"If I could find a job that pays me to sit at the bar and drink beer all day, I’d never work a day in my life!"
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"Remember, it’s not the years in your life that count, it’s the beers in your life."
"Sometimes, you just need to take a break and have a beer. It won't solve your problems, but it might help you forget them for a while."
"If you can't fix it with duct tape, you haven't used enough duct tape."
"I thought about becoming a professional loser, but then I realized I was already doing that for free!"
"Life only has as much meaning as you give it. So, let’s give it a lot of meaning — and beer!"
"When everything falls apart, just remember: it's not about how hard you fall; it's about how many beers you have on the way down!"
"If you're going to fail, fail spectacularly."
"The only thing standing between us and our dreams is a little thing called reality."
"Why do we have to talk about feelings? Can’t we just drink beer instead?"
"If I wanted to hear from an asshole, I’d deflate a football."
"Happiness is a warm beer and a bad game on TV."
"Every day can be a good day if you start it off with a good beer!"
"I love my life; it’s just too short and filled with too little beer."
"If beer were a job, I’d be the CEO!"
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"Never underestimate the power of a good beer to bring friends together."
"Life isn’t about finding yourself; it’s about finding a great bar!"
"Cheers to the friends who make our lives complete, and beers that make every moment worth celebrating!"
"It's a good thing I don't have to pay my bills with charm."
"I'm not really a joiner. I mean, I'm not a guy who goes out and makes friends and stuff."
"Life is all about the little things. Like being able to open your mouth and just say, 'Oh! It's a beautiful day!'"
"I may be a loser, but I'm a loser with a life."
"I can't go to the gym. I'm too busy getting ready to go to the gym."
"I have a very low tolerance for stupid people."
"You know, I think the worst thing in the world is to be treated like you're not worth anything."
"If I were any more laid back, I'd be comatose."
"What did we learn today? Anything is possible, even getting out of bed."
"You can't rush people who don't want to be rushed."
"I'm not lazy, just on energy-saving mode."
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"Sometimes I wish I could be more ambitious. But then I remember I like my couch."
"The only thing worse than being bored is being busy doing things you don't want to do."
"There's nothing like the sound of a great beer being opened."
"I figure I’m about as good as I’m going to get, but that’s okay."
"All I want is a little bit of lovin' and a whole lot of beer."
"Failure is not an option. It comes bundled with the software."
"Sanity is just a matter of perception."
"Ah, I love the smell of coffee in the morning. It smells like victory."
"Everything happens for a reason... but maybe not that reason."
"A little bit of earnestness goes a long way, especially when you're trying to get out of doing something."
"Another day, another dollar. Or in my case, another day, another beer!"
"I'm just going to sit here and enjoy my drink until it's time to not be here anymore."
"There's no shame in enjoying the simpler things in life."
"You can’t buy happiness. But you can buy beer, and that’s kind of the same thing."
"Hope for the best but prepare for the worst. Like hoping for a free drink but being ready to pay for it."
"I've learned that the key to life is to just not take it too seriously."
"I don’t know what to say. I’m at a loss for words."
"This is so exciting! I can barely contain my enthusiasm!"
"You know what they say: life is too short to be serious all the time."
"Women don’t want to hear what you think. Women want to hear what they think—in a deeper voice."
"Like they say, you can't put a price on life. But you can put a price on a round of drinks!"
"I want to be in charge of my own destiny. That's why I'm usually in charge of the bar stool."
"Sometimes you'll find that your friends will choose the worst moments to make a fool of themselves."
"She said, 'I can't believe you're on a date.' I replied, 'Actually, I’m just warming up for my next bar tab.'"
"The secret to happiness is always having a drink in your hand."
"I’ve got a great life: I wake up in the morning and have no idea what to do with my day!"
"I think I've found a way to cope with everything life throws at me… scotch and soda."
"There’s a fine line between being adventurous and just being foolish."
"You can’t just sit around and wait for life to happen. You’ve got to find your own bar and pull yourself a drink!"
"I don't plan my life, I adjust my drink!"
"Sometimes I think I've discovered the meaning of life. Then I realize it was just the bottom of my glass!"
"Hanging out at the bar: where I find clarity in the bottom of a bottle!"
"If I were a drink, I’d be a classic cocktail; smooth with a twist of humor."
"To me, happiness is just a well-mixed drink away."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it ‘lunch’!"
"Rumors about my drinking are absolutely true, and I’ll drink to that!"
"Being a bar fly is all about making a good landing!"
"You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a round of drinks – which is kind of the same thing."
"The world is my oyster – as long as it’s served with a cocktail!"
"Friends who drink together, think together – even if they don’t always remember it!"
"Life is basically a cocktail. It’s all about finding the right mix!"
"I don't want to be a product of my environment. I want my environment to be a product of me."
"It’s a good day if you don’t drink your breakfast."
"Just because you're not in the mood to drink, doesn't mean you should stop drinking."
"I’m not an alcoholic. I’m a drunk. Alcoholics go to meetings."
"If you put a little bit of beer in your margarita, it turns it into a chelada!"
"Sometimes you crush your enemies and sometimes they do it for you."
"You don’t need to be an alcoholic to enjoy a good drink."
"I love the smell of liquor in the morning!"
"I could quit drinking... but I won’t."
"A little heartburn never hurt anyone."
"It’s not the destination, it’s the journey… to the bar."
"Any boy can go to the bar, but it takes a man to pull the tab."
"Here’s to days that never quit, and drinks that never run dry!"
"Real friends don’t let friends drink alone."
"The best part about being drunk is that it’s the only time you really feel alive."
"When in doubt, have a drink."
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
"Every beer is like a piece of art... a messy one, maybe."
"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy a beer, and that's pretty close."
"Alcohol: because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad."
"Why do they call it happy hour? Because it usually only lasts an hour."
"I may be drunk, Miss, but in the morning I will be sober and you will still be ugly."
"A polished man is just a drink away from being a gentleman."
"To me, the best part of bar philosophy is that it’s always happy hour."
"It’s not drinking alone if the dog is home!"
"Life is too short to drink cheap beer."
"There’s nothing a cold beer can’t fix."
"I’m not much for celebrations. I’d rather have a quiet evening with a couple of friends, a scotch, and maybe some of that comedy album you got me for my birthday."
"I think my love of beer is rivaled only by my love of not having to cry."
"What can I say? I like to drink alone. That's how I like to enjoy my misery."
"I can’t help it if I’m always right. I’m Norm Peterson."
"I’m a man, I’m not perfect. But you know, I’m pretty close."
"I'm just a simple guy who loves his beer and his friends."
"I am always ready to take on the world, especially when I have a cold one in hand."
"The only thing better than a cold beer is a good friend and a cold beer."
"It’s always a good time for a drink. At least I think so."
"If there's one thing I've learned about life, it's that you should always have a good drink in your hand."
"You know, some people see the glass half-full; I see it as just needing refilling."
"I’m not just any barfly; I’m a connoisseur of fine drinks and deep talks."
"Life is too short to drink bad beer."
"I prefer my solitude with a nice pint."
"Cherish your friends because they’re the ones you’ll have a drink with when times are tough."
"To me, there's nothing like a good laugh over a cold beer."
"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy beer, and that's pretty close."
"Every problem can be solved over a drink — or at least forgotten for a while."
"When life gives you lemons, trade them for beer."
"There's no such thing as too much laughter or too much beer."
"Sometimes, you just need a good drink and a better friend to help you forget."
"Belly up to the bar, my friend. We've got world problems to solve!"
"As long as there’s beer, there’s hope."
"Here’s to another day of life, my friends! And to drinks that make it better!"
"You never know where life will take you, but it's surely better with a bottle at hand."
"I don’t always need a reason to have a drink; sometimes I just want to enjoy being alive."
"At the end of the day, if I can have a drink and a laugh, I consider it a success."
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