75 result(s) for Michael Scott Quotes.
"That's what she said... or he said. Right, Oscar?"
"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - Wayne Gretzky - Michael Scott"
"I will not be blackmailed by some ineffectual, privileged, effete, soft-penised debutante."
"I love inside jokes. I'd love to be a part of one someday."
"Never, ever, ever give up."
"I'm an innovator, I'm a creator, a motivator, a foodie. I've got a plethora of ideas and innovations and ventures and schemes underway."
"It's not like booze ever killed anyone."
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"I really should have a tweeter account."
"I have got to make sure that YouTube comes down to tape this."
"You know what they say fool me once, strike one but fool me twice... strike three."
"That's what she said, and she was the governor of New York."
"I'm an expert in photoshop. And I brought in an expert. His name is Ned. And I drew on his face."
"I'm an idiot. How many places did you apply to?"
"I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."
"Well, it's love at first sight. Actually, it was. My mom is a great photographer."
"I'm an adult. I can eat 8 packets of ketchup."
"That's just Toby in HR. Not part of my family."
"I'm not superstitious, but I believe in luck. And luck is when preparedness meets opportunity."
"I saved a life; my own. Am I a hero? I really can't say, but yes."
"I am an early bird and a night owl. So I am wise and I have worms."
"Business is like a jungle. And I am like a tiger. And Dwight is like a monkey that stabs the tiger in the back with a stick."
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"Dwight, you ignorant *bleep*!"
"I don't understand. We have a day honoring Martin Luther King, but he didn't even work here."
"It's a pimple, Phyllis, Avril Lavigne gets them all the time and she rocks harder than anyone alive."
"I understand nothing."
"I'm an expert in Photoshop. *clears throat* I made this entire table."
"I'm not crying, it's just been raining on my face."
"Guess what, I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me."
"I'm not great with advice... Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?"
"I'm not offended by homosexuality. In the 60s I made love to many, many women – often outdoors, in the mud and the rain, and it's possible that a man slipped in. There would be no way of knowing."
"I want you to rub butter on my foot...Pam, please? Pam, I want you to rub butter on my foot."
"I'm not a hero. I put my bra on one boob at a time, just like everyone else."
"It takes an advanced sense of humor. I don't expect everybody to understand."
"I am a huge Woody Allen fan, although I've only seen Antz. But I'll tell you something. What I respect about that man is that when he was going out with his daughter, he had the gumption to still make movies."
"I have cause, it is beCAUSE I hate him."
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"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. – Wayne Gretzky"
"That's what she said. Or he said. Equal opportunity not inappropriate comment maker."
"Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."
"I feel like all my kids grew up, and then they married each other. It’s every parent’s dream."
"I talk a lot, so I've learned to just tune myself out."
"That's what she said. Or he said. Also possible."
"Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked, but it's not like this compulsive need to be liked."
"I have cause. It is beCAUSE I hate him."
"I am an entertainer. If people are laughing, I am doing my job."
"And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do."
"I hate so much about the things that you choose to be."
"That’s sort of an oaky after-birth."
"I burnt my foot on my George Foreman Grill."
"I am an early bird and a night owl... So I am wise and I have worms."
"Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me."
"I don’t hate it. I just don’t like it at all and it’s terrible."
"That's what she said."
"I'm an early bird and a night owl. So I'm wise and I have worms."
"I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY!"
"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."
"Well, well, well, how the turntables..."
"I talk a lot, so I've learned to tune myself out."
"Dwight, you ignorant slut!"
"Why are you the way that you are?"
"I'm an early bird, catch the worm, worm gets the cheese. It's a game of hungry, hungry hippos."
"That is what she said. Or he said! No, I, I misquoted, I'm sorry."
"Guess what? I have flaws. What are they? Oh, I don't know. I sing in the shower. Sometimes I spend too much time volunteering. Occasionally I'll hit somebody with my car. So sue me."
"Sometimes I'll start a sentence and I don't even know where it's going. I just hope I find it along the way."
"I was never in this for the money. But it turns out, it's a lot about the money."
"You miss 100% of the shots you don't take. - Wayne Gretzky"
"I'm an early bird and a night owl. So I’m wise and I have worms."
"I am an entertainer at heart and at the end of the day, I just want to make people smile."
"Presents are the best way to show someone how much you care. It's like this tangible thing that you can point to and say, 'Hey, man, I love you this many dollars worth.'"
"I’m not offended by homosexuality. In the 60’s, I made love to many, many women that were of a different race, but I will be damned if I let the government dictate who I can and cannot love."
"I am Beyoncé, always."
"I am running away from my responsibilities. And it feels good."
"I am dead inside."
"I wish there was a way to know you're in the good old days before you've actually left them."
"I don't hate it. I just don't like it at all and it's terrible."
"I want to jump off a bridge because of how incredibly awesome this is."
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