126 result(s) for Funny Quotes About Canada.
"I wish I could be as thin as my patience."
"In Canada, not reading poetry is the national pastime."
"I wanted to be a part of this country, which I was trained to love, and the people in it. I didn't want people to see me as a foreigner, but as someone who belonged here, and this country is a good place to be."
"Only in Canada can a politician be too honest."
"We're the only country that has a national holiday dedicated to a political figure I think few of us really admire."
"Canada has always been there to help people. Look at the hockey players. They come over, they buy houses, they learn the language. They’ve contributed a lot over the years."
"Canadians are polite and nice, but they are not pushovers. They will help you, but don’t mistake kindness for weakness!"
Can't find the quotes you're looking for?
"Canada is just the United States with better manners."
"You know you’re in Canada when you apologize to the person who ran you over."
"Canadians are really just a bunch of people wearing winter jackets and sipping on Tim Hortons coffee."
"If you don't love Canada, I don't know what your problem is."
"The cool thing about Canada is there’s a defined area that if you get lost, it’s because you’re walking too slowly."
"I love Canada. I love how there’s a place for everyone in this country, even if it is under a pile of snow."
"Canada has the best bacon. I'm serious. There really is a difference."
"In Canada, we have such a shared history, the only thing that separates us is a language and a few beers."
"I had a great time in Canada. It is just a nice place where you don’t have to worry about things that you worry about in other countries."
"Canadians are the only people who can wear a whole outfit made out of flannel and still look fashionable."
"Canada is a country that’s united by ice, hockey, and too much maple syrup."
"Montreal is the only city where people say ‘Welcome to Canada’ as if they are peeling off a band-aid."
"Canada, where and when you turn, you find a new way to apologize."
"A Canadian is someone who loves everyone except for the one guy who stole their parking spot."
Can't find the quotes you're looking for?
"An interesting aspect of being Canadian is the inherent belief that everything in the world can be fixed with a cup of coffee."
"One way to understand Canada is through its sense of humor. A humor that is disarming and sincere."
"The people of Canada are like the maple trees that produce fine syrup; both require a little time and patience before showing their sweetness."
"Canada is like a loft apartment over a really great party."
"In Canada, we have a saying: 'You have to be careful who you lend your last two bucks to.'"
"I love Canadians. They always have a way of making you feel good. They’re so grateful for everything."
"A Canadian is sort of like an American but without the gun."
"Canadians are like a big batch of poutine. Sometimes you just want to smother them in gravy."
"If you think the world is getting worse, just remember: there’s still Canada."
"Only in Canada can you get a beer and a poutine at the same time!"
"Canada is an island of safety in a world of chaos."
"I don’t think anybody wants to be a Canadian citizen just to buy beer on Sunday."
"What’s the difference between an American and a Canadian? The Canadian thinks the Americans are crazy, and the American thinks the Canadians are just weird."
"I hear the national anthem in Canada is: ‘We’re Sorry.’"
Can't find the quotes you're looking for?
"Canada: where people are polite enough to say 'I’m sorry' even when they don’t mean it."
"Canada: The only place where a friendly encounter can turn into a polite standoff."
"You can take the Canadian out of Canada, but you can’t take the maple syrup out of the Canadian."
"What do you call a group of musical whales in Canada? A whale-o-gram."
"The best part about being Canadian is that you can complain about the weather for six months without anyone thinking you're insane."
"Ice hockey is Canada’s favorite blood sport, and it has the fans to prove it."
"Canadians are nice, but they’re not harmless. They’re just polite about it."
"In Canada, you can take a winter drive and run into a moose who’s wearing a sweater."
"Why did the Canadian cross the road? To say sorry to the other side."
"If all you can do is maul your way to success, then you should probably consider moving to Canada."
"Rudeness is a one-way ticket to not being Canadian."
"Canada: just like Europe, but with less attitude and more snow."
"Oh, Canada! Please don’t take us seriously–we have enough jokes."
"What’s a Canadian’s favorite spice? Sorry!"
"I’d live in Canada, but I hear their healthcare is not bad!"
"I'm not sure what's worse: The fact that there's a 'thing' about Canada or the fact that I know what the 'thing' is."
"Canada has always been there to help Americans. We save them when they are stupid enough to try and do something like legalize weed."
"In Canada, we have a saying. 'It's all about the hockey and all about the beer.' I don't think it's true. But we like to pretend it is."
"I love Canada. We should have the National Canadian Truth and Reconciliation Day, to reconcile how everybody thinks this is not a real country!"
"Canada: where ‘please’ and ‘thank you’ are used so often it almost feels insincere."
"The Canadian version of a harsh insult is, 'Please play closer to the curb.'"
"Canadians are just invisible Americans."
"I went to Canada and I couldn’t find any moose! Just kidding – all they have is moose!"
"Canada: Where even the geese are nice."
"In Canada, we don't just say we're sorry; we say 'I'm sorry for that inconvenience, eh?'"
"If you can't afford to travel to Canada, just go outside in winter and find a friendly stranger."
"You know you're Canadian when you're not much of a fan of their hockey team, but you still defend them vigorously."
"I could never imagine living in a place where the natives were hostile. That’s why I live in Canada – our natives are cool."
"Canada's not the place you go to escape. It's the place you go to raise your kids and have a good life."
"In Canada, we use ‘eh’ as a conversation filler, as in, 'It’s cold out, eh?'"
"I thought I was going to Canada, but it turns out I was just going to the coldest part of America!"
"When it snows in Canada, we have two choices. Stay inside or create the world's largest snowman!"
"Canadians are always polite, even during a snowstorm. 'Sorry, did I bump into you?' 'No problem, eh?'"
"You can easily tell a Canadian from an American by how they respond to a minor car accident. Canadians check to make sure everyone’s okay, and then apologize!"
"A Canadian is someone who knows how to make the best out of a snowstorm – hot cocoa and board games!"
"Canada: the only country that survives winter by creating multiple parties in igloos."
"We are all on the same page when we still complain about our winter weather while secretly loving it."
"In Canada, we turn the thermostat down in winter and say, 'It’s good for our character.'"
"If Canada had a motto, it would be: 'We're all a little nicer here.'"
"Canada is like a slice of pie – sweet on the outside, mysterious on the inside!"
"The secret to Canadian happiness: hockey rinks and maple syrup."
"I'm not saying Canada is boring, but I couldn't find a map of it at the airport gift shop."
"Canada is like the north end of the United States. I think it’s why the United States won’t let us in."
"In Canada, not reading Shakespeare is as common as not reading Charles Dickens. Especially amongst the French."
"Canada: where the snow is cold and the people are warm."
"I thought I was doing okay when I moved to Canada, but the moment I realized I had to pay for ketchup made me feel like I just joined the union."
"If you think I'm crazy, just remember: I live in a country where they apologized for hockey fights."
"Canada is an Indian word meaning ‘big village’ or ‘peaceful place’ or ‘bore.’ Take your pick."
"You know you're Canadian if your local Tim Hortons is busier than a bar in Vegas."
"The only time I feel close to the United States is when the dryer is on."
"Canadians are polite. They're like Americans, but without the assumption that everyone is a jerk."
"I went to Canada once; it was pretty great. They had a lot of snow, and they were all really nice. I was kind of suspicious."
"In Canada, there are no gunshots at night, but you will pick up a few hockey pucks."
"Why did the Canadian cross the road? To get to the middle!"
"You can be in Toronto, and within an hour and a half, you can be in the wilderness of Canada, which is amazing."
"Canada has a great hockey team, and the players are very polite after they beat you."
"Canada: where it’s always polite to say ‘sorry’ and ‘thank you’—even when the other person isn’t wrong."
"I think Canada is awesome. It’s just too bad it doesn’t have a decent sports team!"
"You know you’re in Canada when your speed limit is, like, 100 km/h, and you still have a 50% chance of running into a moose."
"In Canada, every time you meet someone, you get a new best friend, but also three awkward silences."
"If you don’t like Canada, you must have a problem with politeness."
"I’ve never met a Canadian who wasn’t nice. It scares me."
"Life is a bit like hockey — you’ll miss 100% of the shots you don’t take, unless you’re Canadian, then you just apologize."
"Canada: the land where you say ‘sorry’ even when someone else bumps into you."
"You know you are a true Canadian when you see a fire and call it 'outdoor heating.'"
"I love Canada, but it takes forever to make an appointment because they always say, ‘Sorry, eh?’"
"I love Canada. I think it’s the best country in the world. It’s peaceful, it’s friendly, it’s safe – and everybody knows Tim Hortons and hockey are sacred."
"Canada is like a loft apartment over a great party. You know, the kind of place where you just hang out."
"I was watching the Olympics, and I saw these Canadian athletes thanking their parents and coaches and God. And I was like, 'What’s God doing there? He’s Canadian.'"
"In Canada, we have two seasons: winter and road construction."
"Canada is the only country in the world that knows how to play the game of wait and see."
"The only thing better than a Canadian is a Canadian who is more than happy to help you find what you're looking for - or to offer you a napkin if you're crying."
"I like Canada. You can’t really put your finger on it. It’s just a good place to be."
"There's no other place like Canada. Canada is unique in that way. It’s not too far from the sun, but it is far enough away that the risk of sunburn is low yes."
"I don't know what's more embarrassing, my Canadian accent or my inability to pronounce 'Canadian'."
"Whenever I come to Canada, I always feel like I'm on vacation for a week - even when I'm working."
"Canada: Where we love our bacon and our peacekeeping duties."
"I’m not really a ‘war’ kind of person. I am more of a Canadian-type-of-person, where you can just throw maple syrup at your problems and they go away."
"Canadians are polite. We say 'sorry' a lot, even when we’re not wrong. It’s part of our charm."
"It’s so cold in Canada. It’s like climate change went, 'Hey, I know how to raise the temperature! Let’s fix it!'"
"In Canada, we may not have the warmest weather, but we do have the warmest hearts."
"As far as I’m concerned, the only reason to leave Canada is to come back."
"Canada has the highest number of donut shops per capita. I think that says something about our priorities."
"In Canada, when you say 'sorry', it’s not an admission of guilt. It’s just a reflex."
"I’ve heard it said that Canadians are born with hockey sticks in their hands. I just came out of the womb with a Tim Hortons cup."
"People in Canada are so nice. They even apologize to the car when they step on the brake."
"I love Toronto! I love the Canadian attitude. It’s so positive and upbeat. And everybody is so nice."
"Whenever I try to get in trouble in Canada, the worst that happens is I’m offered some maple syrup."
"If you want to know why Canadians love hockey so much, it's because it gives us an excuse to not talk to each other."
"If Canada didn’t exist, we would have to make it up. It’s the friendliest country that never fails to greet you with a smile."
"Being from Canada, I'm always surprised by how nice everyone is when I travel."
Can't find the quotes you're looking for?
