Memorable Johnny Carson Quotes

131 result(s) for Johnny Carson Quotes.
"I don't know what you are talking about, but I can tell you what I believe you are thinking."
Johnny Carson
"The only thing I thought I was going to do was to be a funny guy. And that is what I have always tried to be."
Johnny Carson
"There's a lot of things you have to deal with in life. One thing you can never forget is to have a good time. Don't forget to laugh."
Johnny Carson
"I have not seen one person successful who wasn't a good listener. Listening is key."
Johnny Carson
"The man who is successful is the one who can find all the answers."
Johnny Carson
"It's a good idea to have a good insurance policy, although you're not going to need it until something goes wrong."
Johnny Carson
"You know, you can't be a smart aleck and go around judging people all the time."
Johnny Carson
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"Comedians are made, they're not born; it's an acquired skill."
Johnny Carson
"There is no trick to being funny. It’s about taking a chance with your material."
Johnny Carson
"I think we ought to be able to have a laugh at life. It would help a lot."
Johnny Carson
"A good laugh is sunshine in a house."
William Wordsworth
"The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer someone else up."
Mark Twain
"Humor is reason gone mad."
Groucho Marx
"If you can’t laugh at yourself, you may be missing the biggest joke of all."
Anonymous
"Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious."
Peter Ustinov
"Laughter is an instant vacation."
Milton Berle
"A night out is a great opportunity for comedy!"
Johnny Carson
"I love the way people laugh. I love the way they smile."
Johnny Carson
"If you are a funny person, you can’t help but be at least somewhat interesting."
Johnny Carson
"The only thing that works for me is to be myself and to tell my own stories."
Johnny Carson
"Everyone has a story; it's just a matter of telling it."
Johnny Carson
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"I think the greatest honor you can give is your time."
Johnny Carson
"You can have a good time without being a jerk about it; it unlocks relationships."
Johnny Carson
"The late-night host should be a reflection of the time they are in."
Johnny Carson
"To me, a successful life is the one where laughter and joy are present."
Johnny Carson
"I’m not a big fan of anyone who becomes famous for doing nothing, but I’m a big fan of people who can entertain."
Johnny Carson
"For a comedian, it's a tricky maneuver. You want to be likeable but you have to be a little dangerous too."
Johnny Carson
"I don’t know what the future holds, but I’m sure it’s going to be a lot of fun."
Johnny Carson
"The main part of my career has been dedicated to making people laugh."
Johnny Carson
"If you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will."
Johnny Carson
"There’s a fine line between a long-lived career and a short sitcom."
Johnny Carson
"It’s nice to go out in style."
Johnny Carson
"I think the funniest thing we can do is to keep a straight face."
Johnny Carson
"You never know what’s going to happen next."
Johnny Carson
"As a comedian, you must find humor in the human condition."
Johnny Carson
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"The audience is a funny thing. You can’t always know what they want."
Johnny Carson
"It’s the little things that can change everything."
Johnny Carson
"People will always remember how you make them feel."
Johnny Carson
"Comedy is a way to reach the heart, to penetrate the armor of people."
Johnny Carson
"What I enjoy most is to be able to make someone laugh."
Johnny Carson
"I always thought of myself as someone who could diffuse a situation with laughter."
Johnny Carson
"It’s not the size of the audience; it’s the energy they give back."
Johnny Carson
"Life is an adventure; you just have to have the courage to embark."
Johnny Carson
"A good host has to know how to read the room."
Johnny Carson
"You can’t please all the people all the time, but if you can entertain them, you’ve done your job."
Johnny Carson
"Being funny on television is hard; you’re not just entertaining, you’re inviting people into your world."
Johnny Carson
"Television gives everyone a voice, but not everyone is meant to be heard."
Johnny Carson
"I never once read a book about comedy."
Johnny Carson
"The secret to a successful talk show is to stay true to yourself."
Johnny Carson
"I’ve always felt that talking to people is one of the greatest pleasures."
Johnny Carson
"To me, the only true art is comedy."
Johnny Carson
"Life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans."
Johnny Carson
"A comedian has to be fearless."
Johnny Carson
"I don't know what I would do without you, Johnny. You're my best friend."
Ed McMahon
"The only thing that works is my humor. It’s a big part of me."
Johnny Carson
"I never thought I was funny, which is why I tried to be a comedian."
Johnny Carson
"You know, if it weren't for you, I would have nothing to say."
Johnny Carson
"I think I have a lot of the same values I had when I was a kid."
Johnny Carson
"I don’t think another network is going to pay me to do what I do."
Johnny Carson
"I have a wonderful relationship with my audience."
Johnny Carson
"I hope that you'll stay for all my life."
Johnny Carson
"There are no rules, just love."
Johnny Carson
"It's hard to be funny when you're older; you don't have the same appeal."
Johnny Carson
"If you cannot laugh at yourself, you cannot laugh at life."
Johnny Carson
"I never get paranoid. I find it relaxing to be paranoid."
Johnny Carson
"You can't be a comedian without knowing what is happening in the world."
Johnny Carson
"I was lucky: I never had to worry about ratings."
Johnny Carson
"I didn't know how to act, so I just played myself."
Johnny Carson
"The thing has to be funny. If it’s not funny, it doesn’t matter what you’re saying."
Johnny Carson
"I have more friends as an older man than I did when I was younger."
Johnny Carson
"Whatever you do, or dream you can do, begin it."
Johnny Carson
"You can't let people know what's bothering you."
Johnny Carson
"Even if you’re not a comedian, you can find humor everywhere."
Johnny Carson
"I'm in the blessing business. That’s all I want to do."
Johnny Carson
"I think laughter is important; it’s the best medicine."
Johnny Carson
"When I got to be a celebrity, I got to be a kid."
Johnny Carson
"Make your plan. Now go out and do it."
Johnny Carson
"Comedy is a very serious business."
Johnny Carson
"The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it."
Johnny Carson
"I don't know what we did before we had a lot of these new gadgets. The coffee pot, the toaster, the talking maps."
Johnny Carson
"It's great to be here. I’m all dressed up and waiting for this weather to change."
Johnny Carson
"If you look at the old-time comics, they all had their own style. Sometimes the style is less than, less than the performer."
Johnny Carson
"I think that everyone should have a first love, a last love, and a few in between."
Johnny Carson
"The only thing the audience sees is the joy of your performance, not the hard work that went into it."
Johnny Carson
"I love the rhythm and the speed of my show. I try to keep it moving."
Johnny Carson
"You know you’re getting old when you pull down your socks and your and your pants fall down."
Johnny Carson
"I think comedy is a concept, it’s believing in the ridiculous."
Johnny Carson
"The worst part about being a comedian is that everything lasts just a little bit too long."
Johnny Carson
"I enjoy working, and this is the only thing I know how to do."
Johnny Carson
"I have done almost every kind of show there is, and now I am going to do what I love."
Johnny Carson
"A little nonsense now and then, is relished by the wisest men."
Johnny Carson
"I never thought that I'd be having so much fun."
Johnny Carson
"One of the hardest things to do is to get an egg to scramble."
Johnny Carson
"Nothing makes me feel more indispensable than making people laugh."
Johnny Carson
"I will miss you all, I will miss the show."
Johnny Carson
"To me, the most important aspect of comedy is timing."
Johnny Carson
"There's a fine line between humor and tragedy."
Johnny Carson
"I’m not interested in being interesting. I’m interested in being interested."
Johnny Carson
"I am happy with what I have, and I want you to be too."
Johnny Carson
"Life is like a sitcom, you have to write your own jokes."
Johnny Carson
"Comedy is all about making people think about the absurdity of life."
Johnny Carson
"It’s not what happens to you, but how you react to it that matters."
Johnny Carson
"The secret of comedy is that there is no secret."
Johnny Carson
"I think laughter is a good thing."
Johnny Carson
"If you’re not having fun, you’re doing something wrong."
Johnny Carson
"I think it's time to try to take a little break. I'm tired of being the host."
Johnny Carson
"The person who is waiting for a roast to cook is a man who has nothing to do."
Johnny Carson
"If you look for the bad in people expecting to find it, you surely will."
Johnny Carson
"The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age."
Johnny Carson
"You can't be funny if you're not in control of your audience."
Johnny Carson
"I love to see a young person who knows where he is going. That’s why I’ll never be young."
Johnny Carson
"It's a long road that leads to a sentence."
Johnny Carson
"I think I've been funny enough."
Johnny Carson
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself... and high school gym classes."
Johnny Carson
"I never was a child, but I was once young."
Johnny Carson
"I heard a doctor tell a patient, 'Just take one pill every day until you feel better.' The patient asked, 'Is it the same pill every day?' The doctor replied, 'Oh no, you’ll get different pills. They’ll mix them up to keep you from getting bored.'"
Johnny Carson
"I am a man who enjoys himself, and I think I always will."
Johnny Carson
"I tend to be a little cynical."
Johnny Carson
"There's a fine line between fishing and just standing on the shore like an idiot."
Johnny Carson
"I think America has a humorous edge. We can laugh at ourselves."
Johnny Carson
"I never trust anyone who doesn't laugh."
Johnny Carson
"The only way to get ahead is to get started."
Johnny Carson
"I've never been a social person. I'm a loner."
Johnny Carson
"I don't need a staff, I just need one person to help me figure out how to breathe."
Johnny Carson
"People said I was funny, but I just wanted to be a writer."
Johnny Carson
"I’m not a people person."
Johnny Carson
"The first rule of comedy is that nothing is sacred."
Johnny Carson
"Comedy is the most difficult form of writing, but also the most rewarding."
Johnny Carson
"Laughter is the best medicine."
Johnny Carson
"If you can find humor in anything, you can survive."
Johnny Carson
"It's nice to have a friend who can make you laugh."
Johnny Carson
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