128 result(s) for Funny Witches Quotes.
"A witch never arrives late, she takes her broomstick to fly right on time."
"I’m a witch, but I don’t do anything wicked. I just love to have fun!"
"Real witches don’t dress like you think. We don’t wear pointy hats or fly on broomsticks. We wear black and drink wine."
"Not all witches are scary, some are simply fabulous!"
"If you can't get rid of the skeletons in your closet, you'd best teach them how to dance."
"Just because you’re not a witch doesn’t mean you can’t have a little fun with your broomstick."
"My broomstick runs on coffee, not on magic!"
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"I’m a good witch. I do good things, like not eat children."
"Witchcraft is just a fancy name for a bad hair day and some really excellent herbal tea."
"Why wear a pointy hat when you can wear a fabulous witch's scarf?"
"Witches: the only ones who can make augury fashionable!"
"I only ride my broomstick on days that end in 'y'."
"Friends don't let friends brew bad potions."
"Laughter is the best potion, especially when it comes with a side of chocolate."
"Warning: Witch inside, proceed with caution—but with a good sense of humor!"
"I am a witch, but I’m no broom-riding, cauldron-stirring, toad-kissing kind of girl!"
"Take my advice—don’t make me angry; you won’t like me when I’m grumpy without my coffee!"
"Broomsticks are for getting places fast, not for drama!"
"Witching hour? More like 'witching half an hour' before I need a snack!"
"Beware of witches bearing gifts—especially if those gifts come with a side of chocolate!"
"Magic may be in the air, but so is my essential oil diffuser!"
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"If I can’t take my cauldron to the beach, I’m not going!"
"The only potion I’m interested in is the one that makes me laugh!"
"A house without a witch is like a garden without flowers."
"Never underestimate a witch's ability to add a touch of humor to any spell… or situation!"
"Witchcraft: the art of making ordinary days a little more enchanting."
"I’m not a witch; I’m your wife!"
"If you can’t find a good witch, it’s probably because she’s busy being fabulous."
"Witching you a Happy Halloween!"
"I put a spell on you because you’re mine!"
"I might look like a witch, but that's just because I have a great Halloween wardrobe."
"Why did the witch refuse to ride her broom? She couldn’t find her flying license!"
"A witch can’t be both cruel and kind, but she sure can be sarcastic."
"Witches: because sometimes, you just need to stir the pot!"
"I'm not a regular witch; I'm a cool witch!"
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"Behind every successful witch is a substantial amount of coffee."
"You can't make everyone happy. You're not a witch."
"Magic is all about mischief and mayhem!"
"Witch, please! I've got spells to cast!"
"Just because I’m a witch, doesn’t mean I’ll cast a spell on you. I prefer to do my magic over coffee first."
"Put a little witch in your life!"
"Feeling witchy? That’s just your inner magic calling."
"Don’t be a basic witch; be a wild one!"
"Abracadabra! Just kidding, I don’t know any spells."
"Keep calm and witch on!"
"If being a witch is wrong, I don’t want to be right."
"Spooktacular and spellbinding, that’s just how I roll."
"A witch's life is just like your favorite cocktail: a little bit of magic, a splash of fun, and a twist!"
"Life is too short to be a plain witch."
"The only thing scarier than a witch is a witch with a sense of humor."
"I’m not a witch; I’m a woman."
"A witch is just a woman who has been fed up with the status quo."
"I put a spell on you, because you’re mine."
"If you think I’m a witch, then I’m a witch."
"Witches are just women who are too powerful for their own good."
"Some people think I’m a witch, but I am not; I’m just magical."
"Beware of the witch who speaks softly, for she knows what you don’t."
"The best way to make your dreams come true is to wake up and use a little magic."
"Witchcraft is the power of knowing how to use your brain and your heart together."
"When you can’t find the right spell, improvise!"
"Never underestimate the power of a witch with a good sense of humor."
"A witch can take you from zero to broomstick in 3.5 seconds."
"Witching is all in the details!"
"I’m a witch; let’s make some mischief!"
"A witch without humor is just a practitioner of boring arts."
"My broom is more important than your car."
"I can’t help being a witch; it’s in my bones."
"What’s a witch without her cauldron? A woman who spills all her secrets!"
"Life’s too short to not be magical!"
"How can you be a witch if you don’t have a sense of humor?"
"Witchcraft is about more than just the spells; it’s about the vibes!"
"In this house, we do witchy things."
"Witchcraft: where fun meets the fabulous!"
"Keep calm and carry a broomstick."
"Beware! I may be sweet as sugar but I can turn you into a toad!"
"Magic is believing in yourself. If you can do that, you can make anything happen… like turning your ex into a toad."
"I’m not a witch; I’m just a girl who really loves Halloween."
"The only thing better than a witch is a witch with a sense of humor."
"If you can’t handle me at my broomstick, you don’t deserve me at my cauldron."
"A witch is just a woman who's had enough of your nonsense."
"I'm a witch; I am so much more than your mother told you!"
"Reality is the witch that won't allow me to 'abracadabra' my problems away."
"Witchcraft: An attempt to make live the words of a few who have died amusingly."
"Don’t make me use my witch voice!"
"Wishing you a broomstick full of joy and a cauldron full of laughter."
"I put a spell on you... and now you're my favorite joke!"
"If I were a witch, I'd make the world a better place… with cookies!"
"Real witches don’t need brooms; we trample the patriarchy."
"I’m in a committed relationship with my cauldron."
"Eat, drink, and be scary!"
"Never underestimate the power of a witch with a sense of humor."
"A good witch knows how to stir the pot."
"Every day is Halloween for witches like me!"
"On Wednesdays, we wear spells instead of pink."
"I’d rather be a witch than a whiner."
"Some people call it chaos; I call it my spellbinding life."
"Witches do it better, but only if we’ve had our coffee!"
"A little mischief never hurt anyone. It's part of the witch experience!"
"I could turn you into a frog, but I prefer a good laugh!"
"Too cute to be a witch? Ha! Watch me fly by on my broomstick!"
"Somewhere, a witch is cackling with delight—probably at my jokes!"
"To be a witch is to know that laughter is the best spell of all."
"Witches are simply women who have not been afraid to be themselves."
"I'm not a witch. I'm your wife."
"I’d rather be a witch than a princess."
"A witch never gets caught. She gets even."
"Well, honey, it’s better than being a kid with one of those stupid caps!"
"I’m going to be a witch for Halloween! No, really! I’m just going to go trick or treating in my pajamas."
"Every girl is a witch at heart. It’s called being a woman."
"If you want to know what a witch looks like, just look in the mirror."
"I don’t need a cauldron to cook up some trouble."
"Being a witch is like being a manager: you need to get people to follow your orders, but you can still have some fun!"
"How do you make a witch a better person? You turn her into a toad!"
"I can’t help but love a good Halloween. It’s the one day I can be as witchy as I want!"
"Why don’t witches like to ride their brooms when they’re angry? They’re afraid of flying off the handle."
"A witch with a sense of humor is a happy witch."
"I put a spell on you, now you’re mine. And on Halloween, I put a spell on all the candy too!"
"Witchcraft is a word that strikes fear into the hearts of many. They know they won’t stand a chance in a battle of wits!"
"If the broom fits, ride it!"
"What do you call a witch who only serves fast food? A McWitch!"
"My broomstick runs on coffee and cackles."
"You know you're a witch when your idea of a fun Friday night is brewing potions and watching horror movies."
"I’d tell you my secret broomstick recipe, but then I’d have to hex you."
"Some days you’re the witch, some days you’re the pumpkin."
"I’m not just a witch; I’m a good witch with a playful side!"
"Why did the witch break up with her boyfriend? He kept saying, 'Hocus Pocus,' but never did any magic!"
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it 'lunge and crunch a witch!'"
"Witch, please! I’ve got magic to do and spells to brew."
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