Memorable Funny South Park Quotes

127 result(s) for Funny South Park Quotes.
"Oh my God! They killed Kenny!"
Stan Marsh
"I'm not fat, I'm just big-boned!"
Eric Cartman
"You know, I don't even know why I bother. I mean, I'm just gonna end up dead anyway."
Stan Marsh
"The only thing you can trust is your own team. And the only thing you can really trust is an untrustworthy guy!"
Stan Marsh
"Don't be a sad panda."
Tweek Tweak
"You know what? I don't care. I'm going to do what I want!"
Kyle Broflovski
"I love that new smell. It's the smell of defeat!"
Eric Cartman
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"If you have a problem with me, you must be one of those people who's so stupid that you don't understand how stupid you are!"
Eric Cartman
"Sometimes you have to put a little fun in your life."
Mr. Garrison
"I'm a little concerned that maybe I am a bad person."
Stan Marsh
"You can't just sit around and do nothing! Get off your butt and do something!"
Kyle Broflovski
"This is a job for the A-Team!"
Eric Cartman
"You guys, I think I just lost my train of thought!"
Stan Marsh
"You are a bad, bad man!"
Chef
"Can we make it through one holiday without analyzing our parents' dysfunction?"
Stan Marsh
"You know you can’t go around saying the first thing that comes to your mind."
Mr. Garrison
"I don't always get what I want, but when I do, I make it count!"
Eric Cartman
"If we all agree that everyone can be different, then maybe we can all be the same."
Kyle Broflovski
"I've got to admit, I think often about how I'm going to die."
Stan Marsh
"I can't believe I just said that loud!"
Tweek Tweak
"I wish I had a job where I could just say, 'sorry, I'm too busy to work.'"
Cartman
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"I guess I'm just a little... sensitive."
Butters Stotch
"In the end, you just have to roll with it!"
Stan Marsh
"Somebody’s gotta be the hero; I guess it’ll just have to be me!"
Eric Cartman
"Life is like a game of football: you get tackled and learn how to scream!"
Stan Marsh
"I don't care if you're black, white, pink, or green, or if you're a guy, a girl, or a giant piece of crap, just don't mess with my friend!"
Stan Marsh
"You know, it’s okay to be messed up. It’s just the way we express ourselves."
Mr. Garrison
"I’m not fat, I’m just big-boned!"
Eric Cartman
"I learned something today. Sometimes people want to make you feel bad for things you can’t control."
Kyle Broflovski
"It’s not my fault that I’m so popular!"
Eric Cartman
"If you’re not in my friend group, then you must be in the enemy group!"
Cartman
"You’re gonna have a bad time!"
Stan
"Respect my authority!"
Eric Cartman
"I’m going to do what I do best: lie, steal, cheat, and survive!"
Eric Cartman
"I’m not being a b****, I’m just stating facts!"
Sheila Broflovski
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"I have no sympathy for anyone who isn’t completely insane!"
Mr. Mackey
"You know, I think I’m starting to understand why they call it 'prison'. It’s because they never let you leave!"
Butters Stotch
"Sometimes I’m hard to understand; it’s part of my charm!"
Cartman
"I hate you, I hate you, I hate you! You suck!"
Stan Marsh
"You’re all a bunch of dirty crazies!"
Kyle Broflovski
"Saying 'I’m sorry' is just as important as saying 'I love you'."
Stan Marsh
"Dude, this is like, totally lame."
Kyle Broflovski
"No, you’re just being a b****!"
Cartman
"Life is like a box of chocolates; you never know what you’re gonna get."
Forrest Gump (Mashup)
"I can’t believe I’m still alive!"
Butters
"The Earth is flat and the Moon is made of cheese!"
Cartman
"I want to be a unicorn!"
Butters
"Just because you can’t see it does not mean it’s not there!"
Cartman
"That’s it! I’m going to rankedaa!"
Sheila Broflovski
"I don't want to be friends with you anymore."
Stan Marsh
"Oh, I'm sorry, I thought this was America!"
Cartman
"Screw you guys, I'm going home!"
Cartman
"You know, it’s a shame you have to sit on something that pretty."
Cartman
"I’ll be in my room."
Stan Marsh
"Respect my authoritah!"
Cartman
"You have no idea what you're dealing with!"
Butters
"The problem with the world is that people are stupid."
Eric Cartman
"I’m not fat, I’m big-boned!"
Cartman
"Oh my God, they killed Kenny!"
Stan Marsh
"I learned something today."
Stan Marsh
"It's not fair! I'm not going to be able to ride my bike anymore!"
Butters
"Sometimes it's hard to be a kid."
Butters
"I don't want to be a part of this anymore!"
Kyle Broflovski
"I don't even have a hat!"
Cartman
"You see, I've been in this game a long time, and I know what works!"
Mr. Garrison
"I am so glad I could help you today."
Mr. Mackey
"Oh boy, here I go killin' again!"
Cartman
"This is so dumb, I'm going to throw up!"
Stan Marsh
"If you don't like it, you can go to China!"
Cartman
"They can take our lives, but they can never take our freedom!"
Cartman
"You guys, I don’t think you’re ready for this kind of commitment."
Kyle Broflovski
"I can't help it; I'm full of love!"
Butters
"It's time to kick it up a notch!"
Cartman
"This is not an accident!"
Mr. Garrison
"You don't know what it's like to be me!"
Cartman
"I feel bad for them, they're the ones stuck with him!"
Stan Marsh
"Screw you guys, I’m going home!"
Eric Cartman
"You know, if you don’t have anything nice to say, you’re not paying attention."
Kyle Broflovski
"I’m not fat. I’m big-boned!"
Eric Cartman
"It’s not fair! I’m the only one who doesn’t get to play with my own balls!"
Eric Cartman
"I didn’t get a vote! I didn’t even get a say!"
Stan Marsh
"I’m not a bad kid. I’m just misunderstood."
Butters Stotch
"You guys, I don’t want to get a pool! I don’t want to drown!"
Kyle Broflovski
"I could be wrong, but I’m not."
Eric Cartman
"You can’t just give up! You have to be strong!"
Stan Marsh
"Well, I’m going to bed. I’ll see you guys later."
Kyle Broflovski
"You know what, dude? I don’t even care!"
Stan Marsh
"I’m gonna do what I want to do!"
Eric Cartman
"I’ve got a bad feeling about this."
Butters Stotch
"You’re a foul mouth, you know that?"
Sheila Broflovski
"I can’t believe you guys are going to get me all the way to split my sides!"
Stan Marsh
"Oh great! Now I’m gonna have nightmares for weeks!"
Stan Marsh
"You’re just a boy. You don’t know anything!"
Mrs. Cartman
"If I were a girl, I’d be beautiful!"
Eric Cartman
"This could be the happiest day of my life!"
Butters Stotch
"I love the smell of desperation in the morning!"
Eric Cartman
"Okay, I’m gonna go get a sandwich!"
Stan Marsh
"Gosh, I can’t believe it! This is so exciting!"
Butters Stotch
"You know what they say, ‘Knowledge is power!’"
Mr. Garrison
"Just because you have a good idea doesn’t mean you should use it."
Eric Cartman
"I’m not being rude; I’m just being honest!"
Kyle Broflovski
"I'm not a bad guy. I just like to do bad things."
Butters Stotch
"Oh, my God! They killed Kenny!"
Stan Marsh
"Sometimes I can't believe how stupid I am."
Cartman
"It's hard to be a Jew on Christmas."
Kyle Broflovski
"I want to be a Jedi!"
Stan Marsh
"Screw you, guys! I’m going home!"
Cartman
"Good thing we weren’t wearing any pants!"
Wendy Testaburger
"You know, I really don't think I should be here. You guys are just too cool."
Butters Stotch
"You can't put that on a paper, the paper doesn't know what to do with that!"
Randy Marsh
"You guys, I'm serious! We have to be awesome!"
Cartman
"It’s not my fault you don’t like fun!"
Cartman
"I hate you, you whore!"
Cartman
"We're all just a bunch of silly, stupid idiots!"
Mr. Garrison
"I don't care! I don't care! I don't care!"
Stan Marsh
"You see, the thing is, I have a really big idea!"
Eric Cartman
"Sometimes people just need a little help figuring out their lives."
Mr. Mackey
"I’ve learned that being a smug jerk is what makes you smart."
Cartman
"I can’t believe you’re doing this, you know I’m a sensitive person!"
Butters Stotch
"This is America! We have the right to be wrong!"
Jimbo Kern
"I thought you were supposed to be a badass!"
Tweek Tweak
"Cartman: The reason I’m such a badass is because I’m a leader of the leaderless!"
Eric Cartman
"If you live in America, you’re not allowed to be offended."
Stan Marsh
"You’re a bad influence, mister!"
Butters Stotch
"This isn’t a democracy! It’s a sack of crap!"
Eric Cartman
"Aww, come on, guys! I swear to God I'm a good person!"
Eric Cartman
"Whatever I do, I just want y’all to understand. I mean it!"
Kyle Broflovski
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