125 result(s) for Funny Quotes About Farms.
"I’m not saying I’m a bad farmer, but I did win an award for ‘Best at Letting Things Grow Out of Control.’"
"I love farming! It’s the only job where you can get dirty, have a really bad tan, and still go to town looking like a million bucks."
"Why did the farmer talk to his cows? He wanted to get the moo-sic flowing."
"Agriculture is our wisest pursuit, because it will in the end contribute most to real wealth, good morals, and happiness."
"If you think you’re too small to be effective, you’ve never been in bed with a mosquito."
"Farmers are the only people who can get blamed for something that’s really out of their control – the weather."
"I can't keep calm, I'm a farmer!"
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"Livestock: The only asset you have to feed and care for that creates no income while you own it."
"Farming: We don’t make the world go round, we make it grow."
"The only thing that runs faster than a farm animal is a farmer at the end of a long day."
"Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!"
"Five days a week, my body is a temple. The other two, it’s a barn."
"Why was the chicken so good at farming? Because it was always up to grain!"
"What kind of things do farmers only talk about? The *hay* days!"
"Farmers don’t just eat - they grow their meals with love."
"Man: a creature who has a bright future behind him."
"Keep your eyes on the stars and your feet on the ground — unless you’re a goat, then you can be on a mountain."
"What does a farmer give his wife on Valentine's Day? A hoedown!"
"You can’t be a farmer without a little dirt under your nails."
"You know you’re a farmer when you’re motivated by the scent of fresh soil."
"If you think agriculture is boring, try growing it!"
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"What did the corn say to the farmer? 'You’re all ears!'"
"Farms are the only places where noise is an indication of success."
"Farmers are busy people. Don’t let their serene smiles fool you!"
"I think farm life suits me. I wear overalls and I have the animals."
"The only time to be positive you've got a clear path is when you take a hike."
"Farming looks mighty easy when your plow is a pencil and you're a thousand miles from the corn field."
"I love to farm. I love to farm on a regular basis. It's not something I have to do."
"You say tomato, I say ‘farm fresh’!"
"Why did the farmer win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
"My farm is a little over four acres in size, but I’s’ been told it’s equivalent to about forty pizzas."
"You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a farm and that's kind of the same thing."
"It's hard to be in a bad mood when you’re surrounded by farm animals."
"If you think farmers are just dullards, you should listen to us sing in the tractor!"
"Why don’t cows have money? Because the farmers milk them dry!"
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"Agriculture is the most healthful, most useful, and most noble employment of man."
"You know you’re a redneck if your home has wheels and your car doesn’t."
"On a farm, there is no schematic for how things will turn out."
"In a relationship, one person has to be the farmer and the other has to be the crop."
"Farmers are the backbone of this country."
"There’s a fine line between a long weekend and a farmer whose cow is in the next field."
"The best way to farm is to plant your dreams in the dirt and water them with hard work."
"I'm just a farm girl with a little bit of country charm."
"My plan for today? Same as always: Take over the world... one pumpkin at a time."
"A good farmer is just a bad farmer who didn’t give up."
"Eat food, not much, mostly plants."
"To succeed, you have to believe in something with such a passion that it becomes a reality."
"Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing!"
"I didn't choose the farm life, the farm life chose me."
"If a cow doesn’t produce milk, is it a milk dud or an udder failure?"
"I told the farmer to stop being so dramatic, but he kept raking it in!"
"You know you’re a farmer when you look at your fields and think, 'There’s got to be a better crop than this!'"
"A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion."
"I used to be a farmer, but I got too much 'hay' fever!"
"I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already on my farm!"
"Farming is really just a short game of 'guess what’s under the dirt.'"
"If you think that you’re too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito on the farm."
"A farm is the ultimate state of mind."
"Never underestimate the power of a farmyard joke; it can really plow your worries away!"
"Life is better on the farm, especially if you have a goat to make you laugh."
"Farming: where you get to see a little bit of everything terrestrial!"
"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef!"
"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy a farm, and that's pretty close!"
"That's the thing about farm life: You can always count on a little manure to keep things interesting!"
"Just like a good corn maze, farming keeps you guessing!"
"Why did the pig start a career in music? Because he was great at 'porking' up the tunes!"
"You farm for the harvest, but you live for the corny jokes!"
"Farming is like a dance; you just have to know the right moves and avoid stepping in the wrong stuff!"
"Why don’t cows have any money? Because the farmers milk them dry!"
"My favorite outdoor activity is digging in the dirt — it’s surprisingly therapeutic!"
"What did one farm say to the other? Lettuce improve our partnership!"
"Farming is one of the few professions that has a sense of humor built right into the job description."
"I love my farm. It’s my favorite place to fail spectacularly."
"If you think farming is easy, you’ve never tried to milk a cow that’s left the room."
"I’m so glad cows don’t have hooves, or we’d all be in trouble!"
"Farming is a profession of hope."
"I don't have a farm, but I do have a potted plant."
"If you can’t eat it, it’s probably an ornament."
"I think I could be a millionaire if I could just sell my ideas for a farm."
"Cows are like big, gentle puppies, but they keep moving on you!"
"Farmers are so good at what they do, they can grow food from dirt!"
"Farming: where you can commune with the earth and still have dirt under your nails."
"Why do chickens sit on eggs? Because they don’t have chairs!"
"The only thing better than a farmer’s tan is a farmer’s sense of humor."
"Life is better on the farm; you just have to watch your step!"
"I used to be indecisive. Now I’m not sure... unless it’s about planting!"
"What do you call a cow with two legs? Lean beef!"
"The farmer's market is the only place where you can get a good deal on dirt!"
"Farming: It's not just a way to earn a living; it's a way to get covered in muck!"
"If you get the chance to feed a goat, take it. They’re just so funny!"
"Farming is the only job where you can be broke and still have plenty of crops."
"Why did the farmer plant a seed on his computer? Because he wanted to grow a web site!"
"You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a farm. And that’s pretty close!"
"Farming is like a relationship: a lot of work, but the rewards are unforgettable."
"I don't cows feel about being so well-milked?"
"How do chickens leave the highway? They take the eggs-it!"
"Farming: Not for the faint of heart, but definitely for those who love a good laugh."
"I have a farm, and I need to tell you that even if potatoes are delicious, they have to be the laziest crop ever. They just lay there, waiting to be eaten."
"If you think farming is easy, try working with goats. They're like toddlers with hooves – completely unpredictable!"
"What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef."
"The farmer allows walkers across the field, but the bull doesn't. So, the farmer's running to find the bull!"
"Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field!"
"A chicken crossing the road: poultry in motion."
"I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised!"
"There’s only one thing worse than a bad vegetable: a bad farmer."
"Farmers are like superheroes, except their capes are made of corn stalks!"
"When you’re knee-deep in muck, it’s hard to see the blessings that farming brings."
"Why did the farmer get a divorce? Because he found someone who was a little too corn-y!"
"You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a farm, and that’s kind of the same thing."
"Never trust a farmer. They always have a lot of dirt on you."
"What did the grape do when it got stepped on? Nothing, it just let out a little wine!"
"I spent all day at the farm, and now I’m too tired to turnip the music."
"Life on a farm is short. Always check your produce before getting attached!"
"How do cows stay up to date with current events? They read the moos-paper."
"If you can’t be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning on the farm."
"Farming is not just about growing crops; it's about knowing the right time to tell ol' Bessie to stop moo-ing at 3 a.m."
"What's the best way to communicate with a fish? Drop it a line!"
"You know you're a farmer when you don't care what the weather forecast says; you just hope it doesn't rain on harvest day!"
"Farming: where some days you reap, and other days you just pull weeds!"
"Why did the farmer plant a light bulb? Because he wanted to grow a power plant."
"Nothing beats fresh fruit from the farm, except maybe fresh fruit from the neighbor's farm!"
"Life is a garden, dig it!"
"Being a farmer is like being a magician; you need to be able to pull a rabbit out of the hat, or in this case, a crop from the ground!"
"Bluegrass music is the best soundtrack for a farm – it’s what we call agricultural acoustics!"
"Why did the farmer take a pencil to bed? To draw the curtains!"
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