126 result(s) for Funny Engineering Quotes.
"An engineer is someone who thinks that an effort of 90% is a political compromise."
"If engineers were in charge, they’d focus on making it work before worrying about the details."
"I would like to die on Mars. Just not on impact."
"In engineering, we are taught to solve problems. The problem is we have to find them first."
"To the engineer, the final result is a complicated process that often proves simple in retrospect."
"1.2 kilowatt is three times more power than my ex-boyfriend."
"Engineering: It's like magic, but real."
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"Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again."
"The only way to stay sane in engineering is to remember that it’s not the code that’s buggy—it’s you."
"Engineering is the art of wasting resources with style."
"Why do programmers prefer dark mode? Because light attracts bugs."
"In engineering, the worst mistakes are usually the best examples of why you never stop learning."
"As an engineer, I do two things; I design the impossible and I mock the probable."
"It's not that we’re smarter; we just have more failed prototypes."
"The engineer's motto: 'Make it work, don't make it pretty.'"
"If you think math is hard, try engineering—it's like math but with actual responsibility."
"Engineers are just people who want to make the world a better place while being way too pedantic about it."
"What’s the difference between an engineer and a non-engineer? About three months of productivity!"
"If the world were to end tomorrow, I would still want to be an engineer today."
"Engineering is the closest thing to magic that exists in the real world."
"Behind every successful engineer is a disaster that caught fire and melted."
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"The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary and engineering textbooks."
"The only engineer that I ever met who didn’t speak a bad word about the engineers was an engineer who is an idiot!"
"Engineering: where the odds are good but the goods are odd."
"I could tell you a joke about UDP, but you probably won’t get it."
"Engineers like to solve problems. If there are no problems handily available, they will create their own problems."
"An engineer is someone who is good at fixing things. A dysfunctional relationship is the ultimate engineering challenge."
"Why did the software engineer go broke? Because he used up all his cache."
"There are 10 types of people in the world: those who understand binary and those who don’t."
"Engineering is the art of modeling materials we do not wholly understand, into shapes we can’t precisely analyze, to solve problems of interest to the human race."
"In engineering, there’s no shortage of people ready to change the world. But a great engineer knows how to get the world to change itself."
"A programmer is just a tool which converts caffeine into code."
"If at first you don’t succeed, call it version 1.0."
"Engineering is solving tomorrow's problems with yesterday's tools."
"Without engineering, life would be a messier affair, but at least it would be more amusing."
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"The great thing about a computer is that you can try to turn it off and on again. That fixes almost all engineering problems."
"Why did the engineer cross the road? To hold up the other side."
"In engineering, we can't afford to be wrong or lazy; we must focus on our craft with enthusiasm and diligence."
"Engineers are not boring people, we just get excited about boring things."
"Experts in any field are just people who are better than you at Googling."
"The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces."
"A computer without a programmer is like a dog without a tail."
"Why did the civil engineer break up with his girlfriend? She said he took her for granted, but she had no idea how hard it was to build a relationship like theirs."
"I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."
"Good engineers are born creative, but good engineering is a learned skill."
"If engineers were to put a gravity switch on the world, they wouldn’t be able to follow through because someone would forget to flip it back."
"Computers are like air conditioning: they stop working properly if you open windows."
"I think the main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing."
"Engineering is the art of doing for a dime what any fool can do for a dollar."
"A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems."
"In engineering, there’s no such thing as an ‘impossible’ task; there are only ‘interesting’ challenges."
"To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer."
"The most dangerous thing in the world is an engineer with a hot glue gun."
"Why did the engineer cross the road? To make it safer for others."
"We’re all engineers. We’re just focused on different questions."
"An engineer is a person who expects mistakes in the future and spends his life preventing them."
"The only problem with troubleshooting is that sometimes trouble shoots back."
"Engineering: where the math is made up and the laws don’t apply."
"Good engineers can build bridges, but great engineers can burn them."
"What we really want is not a single grand design, but rather a series of little designs."
"The key to life is how well you see the problem you need to solve."
"If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done."
"Engineering is about using science to find creative, practical solutions."
"If at first, you don't succeed, call it version 1.0."
"Engineers do it with precision."
"I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work."
"The engineer has been, and is, a creator of the world's wealth."
"Safety first, but accuracy is especially important."
"Without engineers, the world would still be at the beginning of time."
"Life is like an engineering project: a lot of planning, a moderate amount of execution, and a handful of surprises."
"Engineering is not only study of 45 subjects but it is moral studies of intellectual life."
"Why don’t engineers play hide and seek? Because good luck hiding when they can always find the shortest path!"
"Engineering: It's like a puzzle that you have to solve without knowing what the picture is supposed to look like."
"The engineer’s first problem in any design situation is to discover what the problem really is."
"In engineering, there is a term called 'rubber band effect', which explains how engineers are always looking for ways to stretch their budgets."
"Engineering: Because even a monkey can design a tree house."
"I am an engineer, so I always have the best ideas. And not just in the bathroom."
"Engineering is the art of making what you want from what you get."
"If it ain’t broke, you’re not trying hard enough."
"To err is human, but to really foul things up you need a computer engineer."
"Engineers are just folks who love to figure out how things work. It’s like a magic trick, but with fewer rabbits."
"Engineering is the only profession that creates fashion. It’s all about the structural integrity."
"Why do engineers confuse Halloween and Christmas? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25."
"A good engineer can build a bridge. A great engineer can build a bridge and then figure out how to make it more efficient. A bad engineer just builds a bridge – right into a river."
"The only thing that works better than a good idea is a good idea caught early enough."
"There are only two kinds of engineers: those who have not yet made a mistake and those who have."
"An engineer is someone who washes his hands before going to the bathroom."
"Engineering is the closest thing to magic that exists in the world."
"In engineering, we don't have failures, we have trial versions."
"The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary."
"A student once asked me how to decide what to study in college. I said, 'Whatever you want to be — unless it’s an engineer.'"
"Engineers: solving problems you didn’t know you had in ways you can’t understand."
"If you're not having fun, you're not doing it right—especially in engineering."
"What is a software engineer? A software engineer is a human who came up with a solution for a problem they caused."
"If we knew what it was we were doing, it would not be called research, would it?"
"Engineering is not only study of 45 subjects but it is moral study of intellect, responsibility and creativity."
"You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do."
"If at first, you don’t succeed; call it version 1.0."
"Engineering is like a puzzle. The pieces are complex but fit together to create beauty."
"Keep calm and let the engineer solve it."
"If engineers were to be paid by the problems they solve instead of the number of hours they work, they'd earn a lot more!"
"Engineering is the art of directing the great sources of power in nature for the use and convenience of man."
"To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target."
"Scientists study the world as it is, engineers create the world that never has been."
"The difference between a good engineer and a bad engineer is that a good engineer knows how to fix a problem without breaking the whole system."
"Engineering: Where the laws of physics and the laws of coffee seamlessly blend."
"Why do engineers confuse Christmas and Halloween? Because Oct 31 = Dec 25."
"An engineer's solution to everything: take it apart and put it back together. If it still doesn’t work, call it a prototype."
"There are three kinds of engineers; those who can count and those who cannot."
"In engineering, we take pride in our ability to turn coffee into code."
"Meetings: Where engineering dreams go to die."
"An engineer is someone who is good at math and science, but still doesn't get why people can't read blueprints."
"Engineers aren’t just problem solvers; they’re problem creators, too."
"To an engineer, an equation is like a computer program; if it doesn’t work, you just have to debug it."
"I'm an engineer. I build things that explode."
"Good engineers are always three steps ahead of the problem—partly because they create the problems themselves!"
"Engineering: because figuring things out is better than making things up."
"I would give my right arm to be ambidextrous."
"In engineering, if something is worth doing, it’s worth over-engineering."
"Half of being an engineer is keeping a straight face while the other half is drink coffee."
"An engineer's life was a lot like a math equation: There are many variables and very few constants."
"Building a better mousetrap only leads to smarter mice."
"The best part about being an engineer is that you have a license to break stuff—professional maneuvering aside."
"Engineering is the only profession where you can get to say you’re working with a few screws loose."
"Engineers: turning coffee into machines since the beginning of time."
"Why did the engineer cross the road? To design the bridge better than the last one!"
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