117 result(s) for Funny Workout Quotes.
"I don’t stop when I’m tired. I stop when I’m done… and then I go eat a cupcake."
"I could exercise, but it makes me spill my wine."
"The only place where success comes before work is in the dictionary."
"I have a great exercise routine. I do a mix of lunges and hot dog stretches."
"Don’t count the days; make the days count."
"I really need to go on a diet, but I just can't get my fridge to fit through the door."
"I'm into fitness... fitting this whole pizza in my mouth."
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"I only workout on days that end with 'y'."
"If you're going to be skinny, you might as well be sexy."
"My workout is to keep my organization in top shape—it's called emotional fitness."
"Exercise? More like 'exorcise' my thoughts about food!"
"I love to work out. I love to watch my workouts go out the window with a pizza."
"I'm on that new diet where you eat everything and hope for a miracle."
"You don’t have to be extreme, just consistent."
"I'll take a 'thirty-minute workout' over a 'six-pack' any day!"
"Being fit is not about being better than someone else. It’s about being better than you used to be."
"I started out with nothing. I still have most of it."
"A good workout is when you make your sweaty soul cry."
"When I feel like exercising, I just lie down until the feeling goes away."
"I don't sweat; I sparkle."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch."
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"Squats? I thought you said 'shots'!"
"I work out because I love my body. I don’t work out because I hate my body."
"Exercise? I thought you said 'extra fries'."
"I like to pretend that my coffee is a protein shake."
"I get a workout by chasing my kids around the house."
"I can't promise I'll be there all the time, but I can promise to get out of bed when a workout is on my agenda."
"Yoga class? I thought you said 'Pour a glass'."
"You know you're out of shape when you're at the gym, and your sweat is sweating."
"The only thing getting 'ripped' is my sweatpants."
"Running late counts as cardio?"
"I'm just here for the snacks."
"I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge."
"If at first, you don’t succeed, fix your ponytail and try again."
"I don’t need a personal trainer; I need a personal chef."
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"Belly laughs are just as effective as crunches."
"Sometimes, I pretend to be normal. But it gets boring. So I go back to being me."
"Everybody wants to be a beast until it’s time to do what beasts do."
"I didn’t come this far to only come this far."
"When nothing goes right, go workout!"
"I used to think I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure."
"I work out because I love my body. I’ll whip it into shape and then put it in a hot bikini!"
"The only exercise I’ve done this month is running out of money."
"I thought I was going to lose weight, but I guess my chocolate chip cookies are fighting back!"
"I’m just a girl, standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"If I can’t wear my workout clothes for the rest of the day, I don’t want to work out."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch … I call it lunch."
"I don’t sweat; I sparkle!"
"I run like the winded."
"I have a “no sweat” policy at the gym."
"I go to the gym because I think my great personality could use a banging body."
"If you’re not supposed to eat midnight snacks, why is there even a light in the fridge?"
"My running pace is a cross between a jog and a sloth."
"If only my bank account filled up as fast as my wait time at the gym."
"I thought I was doing the ‘fitness’ thing, but turns out it was just ‘fit-ness’ whole pizza in my mouth!"
"Don’t worry, I’m just weightlifting… my spirit!"
"I’m on the 30-day diet. So far, I’ve lost 15 days!"
"Exercise? I’d rather watch a video of someone else exercising."
"I like to think of my body as a temple. A temple of doom."
"Sweating like a sinner in church, but I’ll still eat that cake!"
"The only running I do is to the fridge."
"Why do I need a gym membership? I already carry the weight of the world on my shoulders!"
"I can’t even see my toes! I should really work out!"
"My health goals are more about touching my toes than looking like a model!"
"I started with nothing and I still have most of it!"
"I really need to do lunges more often. That was a big step forward."
"I’m not sweating; I’m just leaking awesome."
"I work out because I love my body. But I also lie on the couch because I love my couch."
"Every time I do a sit-up, I think, ‘Wow, I can’t believe I’m this unfit.’"
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch."
"If you still look good at the end of your workout, you didn’t train hard enough."
"The only running I do is running out of time."
"I’ve got 99 problems, but my workout ain’t one."
"I don’t sweat, I sparkle."
"The only bad workout is the one that didn’t happen."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a burpee and a bacon. I call it a ‘bacurpee’."
"Squats? I thought you said shots!"
"If we’re not supposed to eat midnight snacks, why is there even a light in the fridge?"
"I’m in shape. Round is a shape."
"Dieting is the only game where you win when you lose."
"I told myself that I should do lunges to stay in shape. That was a big step forward."
"Fitness: if it came in a bottle, everybody would have a great body."
"I love to work out. It’s the only time I can say I’m getting my life in shape without actually doing it."
"You can’t out-exercise a bad diet, but you can out-pizza it."
"I’m just a girl standing in front of her treadmill, asking it to work."
"Push-ups are like relationships: if you do them right, you benefit."
"I could give up chocolate, but I’m not a quitter."
"I’m on the patch for my chocolate addiction."
"When nothing goes right, go for a run. When nothing goes left, just keep running!"
"I joined a gym and then I realized that I had two left feet and no rhythm."
"Exercise may not change the world, but it will change your world."
"I’m not sweating, I’m sparkling!"
"The only bad workout is the one that didn't happen."
"I lift weights, but it's mostly for my pizza and donuts."
"My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine."
"I'm in shape. Round is a shape."
"If you still look good at the end of your workout, you didn't train hard enough."
"Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!"
"Running late counts as cardio."
"Sweat is just fat crying."
"I don't sweat, I sparkle."
"I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures out what I'm doing."
"The only time I run is when I'm chased."
"I'm on the patch right now — yes, it's a couch patch."
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"
"I work out because I really, really like dessert."
"Dear abs, please make an appearance. Sincerely, me."
"I thought I was going to be a personal trainer, but I can't help myself from sitting down and eating instead."
"Working out is my excuse to eat more cake."
"We’ll be friends until we’re old and senile... and then we’ll be new friends."
"Fitness? I don't remember the last time I went to fitness. Please remind me to do that!"
"I’d rather eat cake than exercise, but I put in some time at the gym to enjoy the cake guilt-free."
"Age is just a number, but so is my weight."
"I’m just here for the ‘after’ photos."
"I can't walk a mile without a good snack halfway through."
"Some people want it to happen, some wish it would happen, others make it happen — I just make it to the couch."
"The best way to get in shape is to keep it fun and humorous!"
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