110 result(s) for Funny Wedding Anniversary Quotes.
"I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
"You know you’re in love when you can’t fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams."
"If you want to sacrifice the admiration of many men for the criticism of one, go ahead, get married."
"A good marriage is like a casserole; only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."
"When you’re in love, it’s like a badge of honor. And when you’re married, it’s like a tattoo. You just can’t wash it off."
"The four most important words in any marriage: 'I’ll do the dishes.'"
"Marriage is a workshop... where the husband works and the wife shops."
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"Remember that once you’re married, you are no longer the center of the universe. The universe is you, your spouse, and every other couple who can’t stop talking about their wedding."
"Happy anniversary! You two deserve each other... in the best way possible!"
"In every marriage, there’s a person who’s always right and a person who’s the husband."
"Anniversaries are a time when you start to contemplate if your spouse is the one you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
"The only thing better than having you for a husband is our children having you for a father."
"Happy anniversary! Here’s to another year of being right... and being wrong."
"Love is sharing your popcorn. Marriage is sharing your remote."
"You married me for my personality. That’s why you keep asking me to change!"
"Cheers to your marriage, the beautiful union of two people who constantly annoy each other in the most delightful ways."
"Marriage is a two-way street. I give you my heart and you give me your pajamas."
"I love you more than coffee, but please don’t make me prove it."
"You grow in your marriage like fine wine – fermented and a little less sweet with age."
"Happy anniversary! Keep on laughing and loving… even when things get tough!"
"In the end, it was never about the wedding cake, but rather who gets the biggest slice of marital bliss."
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"You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake."
"Happy anniversary! Now keep some of your love in your back pocket just in case you need it for the next fight."
"The four most important words in any marriage: 'I'll do the dishes.'"
"Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’ll be looking for a club and a spade."
"The secret of a happy marriage remains a secret."
"We've been married for so long, I can’t remember which one of us is right."
"A good marriage would be between a blind wife and a deaf husband."
"To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides."
"I thought I could be the perfect husband, but then I realized my wife’s idea of perfect and mine were not the same."
"Growing old together sounds great, but does anyone want to grow old together with someone who snores?"
"If love is blind, then marriage is an institution for the blind."
"There’s nothing better than a good friend, except a good friend with chocolate."
"I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always."
"Love is sharing your popcorn."
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"Anniversaries are milestones of love, and love is wise enough to not take itself too seriously."
"After years of marriage, you realize that the most simple things bring the most happiness: like collecting your spouse’s socks from the floor."
"Marriage is all about give and take. You give him a hard time and he takes it!"
"I love you even though you make me insane."
"My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two-timeouts a week."
"The best thing about being married is that I always have someone to annoy!"
"Being married is like having a sleepover with your best friend every night... except you have to share the bed, the snacks, and the remote."
"Happy anniversary! Let's continue this endless battle of who will do the dishes."
"Married life is full of surprises. Some of them are just what you expected."
"An anniversary is a time to celebrate the joys of today, the memories of yesterday, and the hopes of tomorrow."
"The first year of marriage is the hardest. After that, it’s mostly just trying to get your spouse to stop stealing the covers."
"Happily ever after is not a destination; it’s a way of life. It’s all about the journey and the people you choose to share it with."
"Happy anniversary! You’ve successfully survived another year of my sarcasm!"
"If you think your spouse is annoying now, just wait until you hear how they get when they’re tired."
"Marriage is the only war where you get to sleep with the enemy."
"Behind every successful marriage is a couple who knows how to argue and still love each other."
"You two are like a fine wine. The more you age, the better you get — at rolling your eyes at each other."
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbing contractors, and a bartender."
"Marriage is like a deck of cards. At the start, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade."
"The secret to a long marriage is to be a little deaf. It helps with the noise."
"You’re the peanut butter to my jelly, the sunshine to my rain, and the reason I need wine on a regular basis."
"Love is a two-way street, which means both of you will need to dodge traffic."
"I still fall for you every day. But I’m really glad I can fall into my own side of the bed as well."
"Marriage is the golden ring in a chain whose beginning is a glance and whose ending is Eternity."
"Together is a wonderful place to be, especially when you're avoiding the dishes."
"Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener."
"You complete me! Just kidding, you make me crazy, but I love you anyway!"
"Happy anniversary! Remember, there's no one else you'd rather be stuck with than me."
"They say marriage is a great teacher; too bad I’m a slow learner!"
"The only thing worse than a bad marriage is a bad divorce."
"At least we have a pretty good excuse for being miserable together."
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
"A marriage is like a fine wine, if treated properly, it improves with age. If abused, it turns to vinegar."
"When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife."
"We have a wonderful relationship. I seldom get angry, but when I do, it’s spectacular!"
"I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals; I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants."
"A wedding anniversary is the time to celebrate the quality of your marriage. And to remind your spouse just how much you love and tolerate them!"
"Four years into marriage, I finally figured out how to annoy my spouse without being caught."
"The older I get, the more I realize that I’m not going to convince my partner that my way of doing things is right. And I don’t want to anymore."
"I haven’t spoken to my wife in years. I didn’t want to interrupt her."
"If marriage is a fine wine, then I'm missing the good years."
"Happy anniversary! Remember to smile; in a few years, this will all seem funny."
"Marriage is when a man and woman become one. The trouble starts when they try to decide which one."
"My wife and I have the secret to making a marriage last. Two times a week, we go to a nice restaurant, a little wine, good food. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays."
"Anniversaries are a time to reflect—not just on the fights you survived, but the love that thrived."
"The first 50 years of marriage are the hardest."
"We’ve been married for so long, I once asked my wife what she wanted for Christmas. She said, 'A divorce!' I asked, 'Why?'. She said, 'I never liked you.'"
"In marriage, it’s never about who is right or wrong. It’s about what the other person’s alarm clock can tolerate!"
"You know you’re getting old when the candles cost more than the cake."
"Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband."
"The secret to a happy marriage remains a secret."
"Marriage is the only war where one side sleeps with the enemy."
"A good marriage is like a casserole. Only those responsible for it really know what goes in it."
"Love is blind, but marriage is a real eye-opener."
"The four most important words in any marriage: I’ll do the dishes."
"In marriage, everyday you’re given another chance to love your partner, or another kitchen appliance to threaten them with."
"They say that marriage is a great teacher. It teaches you patience, forgiveness, and how to hide your snacks."
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrists. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
"Happy anniversary! Remember, you’re not getting older, you’re just becoming a classic."
"If you want your marriage to last, just remember: Never go to bed angry. Stay up and fight!"
"Marriage is like a deck of cards. In the beginning, all you need is two hearts and a diamond. By the end, you’re looking for a club and a spade."
"A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person."
"I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life."
"Marriage is like a hot bath. Once you get used to it, it’s not so hot."
"The best way to remember your wife’s birthday is to forget it once."
"A happy marriage is the union of two good forgivers."
"Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life."
"Behind every great man, there is a woman rolling her eyes."
"The secret to a long marriage is to stay in love and keep your sense of humor."
"In the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make."
"Happy anniversary! You two are the perfect couple. You complement each other like coffee and donuts."
"Marriage is a partnership where one person is always right and the other is the husband!"
"Don't worry if plan A doesn't work, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet—you're married now!"
"When you’re in a relationship, it’s all about balance: marriage means you balance each other on the crazy scale."
"Anniversaries are a time to celebrate how much you love each other – and how much each other annoys you!"
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