Memorable Funny Quotes About Children Growing Up

25 result(s) for Funny Quotes About Children Growing Up.
"Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything’s broken, and there’s a lot of throwing up."
Ray Romano
"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong."
Charles Wadsworth
"I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then, I want to move in with them."
Phyllis Diller
"The older I got, the smarter my father seemed to get."
Tim Russert
"When I was a kid, my parents moved a lot, but I always found them."
Rodney Dangerfield
"You know your children are growing up when they stop asking where they came from and start refusing to tell you where they're going."
P.J. O'Rourke
"Children begin by loving their parents; after a time they judge them; rarely, if ever, do they forgive them."
Oscar Wilde
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"There are only two lasting bequests we can hope to give our children: One of these is roots; the other, wings."
Hodding Carter
"Before I got married I had six theories about bringing up children; now I have six children, and no theories."
John Wilmot
"Parents are not interested in justice, they're interested in peace and quiet."
Bill Cosby
"The first half of our lives is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children."
Clarence Darrow
"I have found the very best way to advise your children, is to find out what they want and then advise them to do it."
Harry S. Truman
"When I was a boy of 14, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man had learned in seven years."
Mark Twain
"The trouble with being a parent is that by the time you are experienced, you are unemployed."
Unknown
"Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home."
Phyllis Diller
"Parenthood is the passing of madness through the generations."
David Mitchell
"Kids are expensive; I knew that going in. But I didn't realize how broke they'd make me feel."
Jim Gaffigan
"I used to think my parents were strict, then I had kids of my own."
Unknown
"Parents were invented to make children happy by giving them something to rebel against."
Philip Moeller
"The joys of parents are secret; and so are their griefs and fears. "
Francis Bacon
"There comes a time in every kid’s life when they realize their parents can’t fix everything."
Unknown
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"I’ve always felt that if you back-burnered the things that were least important to you, you could then focus on the things that are really important. My children are very important to me, and that’s why I back-burnered a lot of other things."
Tom Selleck
"You don't really understand human nature unless you know why children on a merry-go-round will wave at their parents every time they go around—and why their parents wave back."
William D. Tammeus
"Nothing humbles you like owning something that a raccoon wants."
Tom Papa
"It just occurred to me that raising kids is 90% yelling 'What?!' from other rooms."
Conan O'Brien

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