108 result(s) for Funny Quotes About Sleeping.
"I think sleeping was my favorite part of the day."
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it. But honestly, I also sleep a lot."
"The only thing getting lit this weekend are my eyelids."
"I could be much more productive if I could just find the time to sleep."
"Sleep is that golden chain that ties health and our bodies together."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch."
"I want to be a part of the new Netflix show: 'How to stay in bed all day.'"
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"Insomnia: The only disease that is basically an opposite of a disease."
"I told my doctor I needed to sleep, so he gave me an electric blanket."
"There are no rules for a perfect nap, but your day can fall apart without one."
"Never underestimate the power of a good nap."
"I can’t wait for the weekend so I can sleep in and do absolutely nothing."
"I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure. Unless it comes to sleep."
"I'm just a girl, standing in front of my bed, asking it to love me back."
"If you can't sleep, then get up and do something instead of lying there worrying."
"Sleeping is no mean art: for its sake one must stay awake all day."
"I get my best ideas in the shower when I’m not sleeping."
"Sleep tight, don’t let the bedbugs bite. If they bite, take a bite out of them!"
"Well, it’s not a good idea to fall asleep at work... unless you’re a baby."
"I don’t need it to be easy, I just need it to be worth it. And I need some sleep."
"I think sleeping was my problem in school. If I’d slept less, I’d have done better."
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"The best part about being a parent? You can sleep as much as you want, as long as it’s while the kids are asleep!"
"I want to live in a world where the only time there's a line is in front of the restroom at 3:00 AM during a music festival."
"I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already."
"There’s nothing quite like a good night’s sleep – especially after a bad day."
"If only I could get as excited about sleeping as I do about staying up late."
"To be really happy, one must be asleep."
"Sleep: the most beautiful experience in life, except drink."
"Sleep is like the unicorn – it is rumored to exist, but I doubt I will see any."
"I’m not a morning person, or a night owl. I’m some form of permanently exhausted pigeon."
"The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
"If sleep were a person, I would really want to date her."
"I love bedtime. It’s my favorite time of the day."
"Sleep more, worry less."
"I'm not sleeping, I'm just resting my eyes."
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"My bed is a magical place I suddenly remember everything I forgot to do."
"Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired."
"Sleep is my drug; my bed is my dealer; and my alarm clock is the police."
"I wish I could be as thin as my patience."
"I'm not a morning person. I'm a coffee person."
"If you think I’m in a bad mood now, you should see me when I’m awake."
"There is no sunrise so beautiful that it is worth waking me up to see it."
"I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised."
"I think the best part of waking up is going back to sleep."
"Sleeping is my drug; my bed is my dealer, and my alarm clock is the police."
"I just want to be able to sleep all the time and go to the beach."
"There’s a name for people who don't take naps: ‘unemployed.’"
"If only I could have a nap in my brain, I would be so much happier."
"I need six months of vacation, twice a year."
"Sleep is my happy hour."
"Not all who wander are lost, but I sure am if I don't get my beauty sleep."
"Insomnia is my greatest inspiration."
"I don’t get no respect. No respect at all. I wake up in the morning and my alarm clock says, 'Hit the snooze again.'"
"I could be in better shape, and by better shape, I mean I want to sleep more."
"The only thing better than a good night’s sleep is a good night’s sleep that doesn’t end too soon."
"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"I think people should be allowed to be happy to take naps on the weekends."
"I love naps. I need them more than coffee in the morning."
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"
"I could sleep for a week. Seriously. Bring on the weekend."
"I have never been a big sleeper. I function well on very little sleep."
"I think sleep is the most beautiful experience in life."
"The best part about sleeping is that you can do it with your eyes closed."
"I can't sleep. I can't ember. I'm afraid to do it. I'm afraid to dream."
"People who say they sleep like a baby usually don’t have one."
"Sleep is like a time machine to breakfast."
"I love to sleep. I’m just going to sleep all my problems away."
"Sometimes I pretend to be normal. But it gets boring. So I go back to being me and go to sleep."
"The only thing I want to hang on my wall is a Dreams poster."
"I'm not a morning person. I'm more of a 'get up at noon and go back to bed' type."
"Sleep is my superpower and I'm the superhero fighting the villain known as my invisible alarm clock."
"I finally found out what I want to be when I grow up: I want to wake up."
"If sleeping is wrong, then I don't want to be right."
"I think I need a day in bed without all the demands of life; I need a day of sleep and snacks."
"To be able to sleep well, you need to sleep well!"
"Nap time is the best time; it's like a time machine that transports you to better places."
"The only time I feel alive is when I'm sleeping."
"I'm so old, I remember when I used to have a life; now all I have is sleep!"
"As a child, I never imagined that being an adult would involve this much sleeping."
"I could sleep for a hundred years without ever feeling tired."
"Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives."
"Sleep is the ultimate comfort food."
"I dream of sleep, and it dreams of me!"
"I'm not a morning person. I’m really more of a 'stay in bed and read' kind of person."
"Sleep is the best meditation."
"I love sleep. My life has the tendency to fall apart when I'm awake, you know?"
"I think sleeping was my problem in school. I slept through everything."
"A good laugh and a long sleep are the best cures in the doctor’s book."
"I'm not lazy, I'm just on energy-saving mode."
"Sleeping is my favorite thing to do. It's like my job, but I don't get paid for it."
"When I wake up, I don't think I have to go to work. I think, 'Time for a nap!'"
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
"There is a time for many words, and there is also a time for sleep."
"We are such stuff as dreams are made on; and our little life is rounded with a sleep."
"If sleeping was an Olympic sport, I'd be a gold medalist."
"I think I've discovered the secret of life — you just hang around until you get used to it."
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it, but also I sleep."
"Sleep is like the unicorn — it is rumored to exist, but I doubt I will see any."
"Every night before I go to sleep, I pray to God for a better sleep."
"I can’t wait to go home and sleep in my own bed tonight."
"To all the kids who have ever slept in class, I commend you: that is the spirit of true learning."
"Nothing makes you feel more like a kid than attempting to sleep after one long day at work."
"If I had a dollar for every time I fell asleep, I would be a millionaire by now."
"Sleep is the golden chain that ties health and our bodies together."
"I dream of a better world where chickens can cross the road without having their motives questioned."
"Sleep tight; don't let the bedbugs bite. If they bite, take a big stick and beat them till they're white!"
"People who say they sleep like a baby usually don't have one."
"A day without napping is like a cupcake without frosting."
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