133 result(s) for Funny Cruise Quotes.
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it. Especially on a cruise!"
"Cruise: A journey on the sea where you can ‘sea’ food, ‘sea’ relaxation, and ‘sea’ new friends!"
"I told my wife I wanted to take a cruise to relax. She suggested I start with a trip to the couch."
"The only thing I love more than cruising is the food on the cruise."
"Cruising: where the only thing that moves faster than the ship is my appetite!"
"I don’t need therapy; I just need to be on a cruise ship!"
"I love how you can get lost at sea and still find the buffet!"
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"At sea, I feel safer. It’s the only place you can float and eat like there's no tomorrow!"
"Life is like a cruise ship: It's a floating party until you hit an iceberg!"
"Does this ship make my waist look big?"
"If you don’t like how things are going on the cruise, just wave your hands and yell, 'We’re sailing away!'"
"I came for the sun, but I stayed for the drinks and the sunsets!"
"What happens on the cruise, stays on the cruise… unless it’s a sunburn!"
"If you think my swimsuit is too revealing, you should see my buffet plate!"
"My favorite exercise on a cruise? Running to the buffet!"
"I asked the captain if I could steer the ship. He said, 'Only if you want to go in circles!'"
"Forget love, I’d rather fall in chocolate on this cruise!"
"Why don’t we ever see whales on a cruise? Because they’re all out partying too!"
"You can always tell which passengers are having the most fun—they’re the ones who’ve lost track of time… and their meals!"
"On a cruise, every day is a no-pants day!"
"If there's a buffet, I'll be there—no ship will sail without me!"
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"Let’s just cruise through life like we cruise through the salad bar: no regrets!"
"Why did the pirate take a cruise? Because he wanted to get some booty!"
"On this cruise, my favorite ocean view is from the buffet line!"
"This cruise has more layers than my vacation diet… and I'm loving them all!"
"Being on a cruise is like being in a food coma, but with better ocean views!"
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food on a cruise, and I eat it."
"The only thing better than a cruise is... more cruise!"
"A cruise is just a floating hotel with a water slide."
"I need six months of vacation, twice a year. That's why I go on cruises!"
"They say that money can't buy happiness. But it can buy a cruise ticket, which is pretty much the same thing!"
"I've never met a cruise I didn't like. They are like my friends – they just keep on giving!"
"If life is a journey, a cruise is the most fun way to take it!"
"On a cruise, my favorite exercise is running back to the buffet."
"Cruise hair, don't care!"
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"The secret to enjoying a cruise is to realize that the ship works for you, not the other way around."
"I followed my heart, and it led me to the buffet on a cruise."
"A smooth sea never made a skilled sailor, but a smooth cruise makes for a relaxed traveler!"
"Just bring me a cabana boy and a cocktail while I cruise!"
"In cruise life, calories don't count. They just float away!"
"The best part of cruising is that you can say, 'I’m at sea' and mean it literally!"
"If found on a cruise, please return me to the nearest cocktail bar."
"I'm not a control freak, but I like to steer the ship on my vacations... just not the cruise ship."
"Why do they call it a 'cruise'? Because ‘vacation to Hawaii on a big floating hotel’ wouldn’t fit on the invitation!"
"Climbing the ladder of success is best done on a cruise ship!"
"I don't always take vacations, but when I do, I prefer to cruise!"
"My favorite sport is eating on a cruise ship."
"Why did the cruise ship never get lost? Because it always followed the starboard!"
"Forget the gym. I just do cruise ship exercises: Eatin', loungin', and sippin'."
"The best view comes after the hardest climb, but who needs to climb when you can cruise around the island?"
"You say it's a big world out there; I say it's a big ocean to cruise on!"
"Every cruise is a surprise party where the cake is lemonade, the ice is unlimited, and the party never stops!"
"The best part of a cruise is the meals. You can eat everything you want! Let the ship sail, and you don't have to do any of the cooking!"
"In cruising, as in life, you're never too old to be a kid again. You can run around and act silly, and there are no parents to scold you."
"I don’t need therapy, I just need to go on a cruise."
"Cruising is the only way to see the world without having to pack your bags every day."
"Why do we wait until retirement to go on a cruise? I say we should go while we can still walk and drink at the same time!"
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it—especially on a cruise!"
"Cruises are like a buffet of happiness. You can choose your own adventure without worrying about the calories!"
"I love cruising—because where else can you spend a week on a floating buffet?"
"A bad day on a cruise is still better than a good day at work."
"On a cruise, the only thing I’m committed to is having a good time!"
"If you can’t find me, I’m probably on deck with a cocktail in hand."
"I'm not really into food, but if it's free and comes with a view of the ocean, I'm all in!"
"The only reason I cruise is for the unlimited snacks. Also, the sun and sea… but mostly the snacks."
"Why did the anchor break up with the ship? It found someone more buoyant!"
"In a sea of choices, I always choose a cruise. Because cocktails. That’s why."
"If your ship hasn’t come in, swim out to it."
"I can’t keep calm—I’m on a cruise!"
"I told my wife that a cruise would be a great budget experience. She didn’t think the same when she saw the bar prices!"
"You know you’re on a cruise when every hour is happy hour!"
"Some people just wait for the weekend. I wait for my next cruise!"
"Cruising is the perfect blend of relaxation, adventure, and lots of food. What more do you want?"
"When life hands you lemons, trade them for a margarita on a cruise!"
"My favorite outdoor activity is going back inside on a cruise ship."
"A cruise a day keeps the doctor away—or at least it keeps the stress at bay."
"Ship happens—just enjoy the ride!"
"Floating through life one cruise at a time!"
"Keep calm and cruise on!"
"I told my wife I wanted to go on a cruise. Now I have to spend a week at sea with her – we didn't agree on the destination!"
"Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything, and that includes cruise itineraries!"
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it—especially on a cruise!"
"On a cruise, there’s no ‘back to the gym’ just ‘back to the buffet’!"
"I love cruises. It’s like being in a floating hotel that takes you to places you can’t pronounce!"
"Why did the cruise ship get into trouble? It kept drifting off course to 'sea food' restaurants!"
"On a cruise ship, calories don’t count, right? That’s why I’m always ready to board!"
"If you think going on a cruise is relaxing, you haven’t fought the tide for lounge chairs!"
"The only thing better than soaking up the sun on a cruise is soaking up the drinks!"
"What do you call a ship full of U.S. politicians? A floating lie factory!"
"A cruise is just a floating buffet with a side of waves and sunshine!"
"Cruisers don’t tan, they glow!"
"I wish I could be as thin as my cruise itinerary!"
"Call it a cruise, but really, it’s a giant floating buffet with a tour!"
"They say 'what happens on a cruise, stays on a cruise'—which is perfect for my diet plan."
"A cruise: the only place where you feel guilty for not eating enough!"
"On a cruise, the only thing heavier than your luggage is your breakfast!"
"When they said 'the price includes all meals,' I thought, 'great, I’ll finally get to eat all day!'"
"Cruising is like a relationship: it has its ups and downs, mostly around the buffet!"
"I need a cruise-style income: get paid to eat and sunbathe all day!"
"Trying to choose which dish to eat first on a cruise is the nearest thing to a decision I make on vacation!"
"What’s the first rule of cruising? Don’t wear a watch; you have no time!"
"I don’t need therapy, I just need to go on another cruise!"
"My favorite exercise on a cruise? Running to the buffet before it closes!"
"They say cruising is good for the soul, but I think it’s even better for my taste buds!"
"If I can’t eat wearing a bathing suit, it’s not a real vacation!"
"Life is short—take the cruise, eat the cake!"
"I follow my heart. And it usually leads me to the fridge. Especially on a cruise."
"I can't keep calm, I'm on a cruise!"
"Cruising: the art of getting fat and having fun at the same time."
"I need six months of vacation, twice a year. And a cruise every now and then."
"Life is better on a cruise. Unless you're seasick, then it's just 'meh.'"
"If you don’t like the sea, you can always stay on the ship… and eat."
"Caution: may contain traces of my sunscreen. That's vacation for you!"
"What happens on a cruise stays on a cruise… until someone posts on social media."
"Cruising is just a unique way to get fat while pretending you’re exploring the world."
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it... especially on a cruise!"
"Why did the boat get a parking ticket? Because it left its 'oar' in the water!"
"Why do pirates never get lost at sea? They always follow the 'arr'!"
"A cruise is a great way to meet people... if you enjoy awkward dinner conversations."
"Time flies when you're having rum on a cruise!"
"As long as there’s a bar, I’m on board!"
"Sail away and don’t look back, unless it’s to grab another drink!"
"Exercise? I thought you said 'extra fries!' when at the cruise buffet."
"Who needs therapy when you can just go on a cruise and eat your feelings?"
"I love how the ship moves, like my goals when I’m near the dessert bar."
"Cruising is the only time you can drink all day and still have to question if you really got anything done."
"You can't buy happiness, but you can book a cruise – they’re basically the same thing."
"There should be a cruise themed 'Eat, Pray, Love' where you just eat... and eat."
"Eat, drink, and be merry - it’s a cruise, after all!"
"You know you’re on a cruise when the anchor is the only thing weighing you down."
"Teaching a crab to dance is like trying to pack light for a cruise."
"The only time I want to be ‘sea-sick’ is when I’m eating ‘sea food’!"
"I like my ships like I like my jokes: filled with laughter and floating in the middle of the ocean."
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