109 result(s) for Funny Bar Signs Quotes.
"I can't tell if I'm at a bar or a farm. Either way, I'll take a drink!"
"We have beer, because adulting is hard."
"In alcohol's defense, I've done some pretty amazing things while drinking."
"This isn't a bar. It's a clever holistic therapy center."
"Save water, drink beer."
"Caution: You are now on camera. Wait, actually... can we get you to leave?"
"Warning: Drinking may cause you to think the world should stop for you."
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"Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow you might be hungover."
"Beer: Helping people feel like they’re experts at life since forever."
"Tonight's forecast: 99% chance of cocktails."
"Beer: Because punching people is frowned upon."
"Official drinking team with a soccer problem."
"Love makes the world go round. Beer makes it go 'round even faster."
"This bar is like a dysfunctional family. We're here for the alcohol, but we care."
"Beer now, work later!"
"You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on."
"Happiness is a warm beer."
"Cheers! May your drink be cold and your company be warm."
"I can resist anything except temptation and a good cocktail."
"We don’t serve food here. We serve drinks, and we serve them cold."
"Alcohol: Because no great story started with someone eating a salad."
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"I work until beer o'clock."
"Beer: It's not just for breakfast anymore."
"You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy beer. And that’s kind of the same thing."
"We have a 'happy hour'... it’s when we’re open."
"This is a bar. Nobody's judging you here."
"The bar is open! Bring your own drama."
"I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already."
"I'm not an alcoholic, I’m just a social drinker. A very, very social drinker."
"You don’t have to be crazy to drink here, but it helps."
"In God we trust; all others pay cash."
"I used to care, but now I take a pill for that."
"Here’s to alcohol: the cause of, and solution to, all of life’s problems."
"Drink like nobody’s watching."
"Cerveza: Because adulting is hard."
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"When life hands you lemons, grab tequila and salt."
"Cheers to a new year and another chance for us to get it right (or at least get it a little less wrong)."
"I'm only here for the beer."
"Alcohol may not solve all your problems, but neither will water."
"We don’t serve food here. We serve drinks. You can bring your food in if you want. Just don’t expect us to serve you."
"The bar is open! Don’t worry, it’s only half past the drink o’clock!"
"I only drink on two occasions: When it’s my birthday and when it’s not."
"Eat, drink, and be merry, for tomorrow we may be sober."
"We have all the ingredients for a great night: Good drinks, good friends, and a sign that says 'Drink Responsibly'."
"I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already!"
"Our bartender is a magician. He can make your money disappear!"
"Warning: Drinking may cause you to act like a superhero."
"This establishment is not responsible for what happens after your third drink."
"The best time to drink is always."
"Drinks are the cheapest form of therapy."
"It’s not drinking alone if the bar is open."
"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy a drink, and that's kind of the same thing."
"If you can read this, you’re too sober."
"Here to drink, but not to think!"
"I’m not a regular, I’m a pro!"
"Keep calm and drink on."
"Cheers to all the things that make us happy – like drinks!"
"It’s five o'clock somewhere!"
"Tonight's forecast: 100% chance of cocktails."
"Please don’t drink and drive. You might hit a bump and spill your drink!"
"We don't need a court order to drink here."
"It's not about the destination, it's about the journey. Unless the journey is to the bar."
"We're not drunk, we're just chemically off-balanced."
"Warning: This establishment is known to cause spontaneous laughter."
"Come in and have a cold one! If you don’t drink, have a room temperature one!"
"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
"I used to think drinking was bad for me, so I gave up thinking."
"A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her."
"Everything in moderation, including moderation."
"Drunk in charge of a bicycle is a criminal offense."
"Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 1862."
"The bartender is the only person I trust with my secrets."
"Happiness is a dry martini and a good woman."
"If you can count your drinks, you're not drinking enough."
"A bar is a place where you can’t think too much about anything, especially the bill."
"I don’t always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer Dos Equis."
"Cheers to the nights we won't remember with the friends we'll never forget."
"I like my beer like I like my women: cold, imported, and bitter."
"Beer: The cause of and solution to all of life’s problems."
"I have a dream... that one day I will have a drink without having to worry about the calories."
"There’s no ‘we’ in wine."
"Why limit happy to an hour?"
"Alcohol: Because no great story ever started with someone eating a salad."
"We don’t serve food here, just drinks. And a side of laughter."
"Don't drink and park—accidents cause people."
"This is a drinking establishment with a karaoke problem."
"Our beer is cheaper than therapy!"
"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy beer, and that's kind of the same thing."
"A bartender is just a pharmacist with a limited inventory."
"I told the bartender to make me a drink. He asked 'What do you want?' I said, 'Surprise me.' He poured me a glass of water."
"Beer: Helping ugly people have sex since 3000 BC."
"In wine there is wisdom, in beer there is freedom, in water there is bacteria."
"If you drink, don't drive. Don't even putt."
"Good people drink good beer."
"I drink to make other people more interesting."
"You never know what you have until it's gone. For example, toilet paper."
"I have mixed drinks about feelings."
"Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?"
"The more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap. Stay safe, eat cake!"
"I'm in shape. Round is a shape."
"Life is too short to drink bad wine."
"May your glass be ever full, your plate never empty, and your friends always numerous."
"Drink triple, see double, act single."
"Friends don’t let friends drink alone."
"Save water, drink beer!"
"I would rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy."
"Beats a poke in the eye with a sharp stick."
"If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. If it gives you limes, make margaritas!"
"Take life with a grain of salt, a slice of lime, and a shot of tequila."
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