113 result(s) for Funny Cardio Quotes.
"I get my cardio by running around trying to catch my cat."
"Running late counts as cardio."
"I thought I could be in a relationship with exercise. Turns out it’s more of a situationship."
"If you see me running, it's probably because I left the oven on."
"Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice."
"You know you’re a runner when you have more pairs of running shoes than regular shoes."
"Cardio? Is that a type of Italian pastry?"
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"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch."
"I exercise to keep up with my bad eating habits."
"I run because I can’t fly."
"I hate running, but I love having run."
"Sweatpants are a sign of defeat. You lost control of your life, so you bought some sweatpants."
"I figured if I get the cardio done, I can eat more cupcakes."
"I don’t always run, but when I do, I prefer to forget that I am."
"My favorite machine at the gym is the vending machine."
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."
"Sure, it’s a workout, but so is the struggle to get out of bed."
"I run to eat, and I eat because I run."
"I’m not going to say that I’m lazy, but I just saw a treadmill, and I’m still catching my breath from that!"
"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"Exercise? More like exorcise: getting rid of demons from too much pizza."
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"I get my exercise acting like I’m in a horror movie, avoiding cardio."
"I thought I was in shape. Then I realized I was just really good at cardio."
"If you still look cute at the end of your workout, you didn’t train hard enough."
"Cardio? More like ‘cardi-no’."
"I do yoga to relieve stress. Just kidding, I drink wine in yoga pants."
"If you didn’t sweat, did you even really exercise?"
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it."
"The only running I do is running out of snacks."
"I thought about going for a run, but I decided to take a nap instead."
"I hate running. I can’t wait until I’m old enough to take up walking."
"I don’t always lift weights, but when I do, I might drop them."
"I’m not a runner, I’m a walker who takes long breaks."
"I finally figured out the only reason I’m in shape is because I have a round shape."
"Some people say I’m a little slow, but I prefer to call it 'taking my time'."
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"I run for pizza."
"I don’t exercise. If God had wanted me to bend over, he would have put diamonds on the floor."
"I was going to quit cardio, but then I found out I’d have to run from the ice cream truck."
"The hardest part of my workout is deciding whether to do it or not."
"I love sea turtles. I don't swim fast, but when I do, it's at the buffet line."
"I love running as much as I love pancakes. That is to say, not much."
"I thought about running a marathon, but it's a long way to go just for a T-shirt."
"My favorite workout is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch."
"If you see me running, it's probably because I’m being chased."
"I go running when I have to. Like, when the ice cream truck is doing circles around the block."
"I don’t jog, I possum flop."
"There’s no such thing as too much cardio, unless you count running out of snacks."
"Running is the greatest metaphor for life, because you get out of it what you put into it—unless you’re running away from your problems."
"I’m on the 30-minute plan. I can go briskly for 30 minutes and enjoy a slice of cake afterwards."
"Cardio? I thought you said 'Cardio'!"
"I’m just here for the post-workout snacks."
"If you see me running, it's probably because I dropped my chocolate."
"My cardio routine involves running away from my responsibilities."
"I wish I could lose weight as quickly as I lose my motivation to work out."
"I don’t run to add days to my life, I run to add life to my days—preferably with a side of fries!"
"Running: A way to escape life. Ever since I started running, I haven’t looked back!"
"Every time I start exercising, I realize I have my whole life to regret my decisions."
"The only reason I run is to avoid bad conversations. And ice cream trucks."
"Jogging is the adult version of running away from home."
"My running playlist is just me chanting 'don't stop, until you reach the snacks'."
"Sweat is just your fat crying. Unless you're just avoiding dessert."
"If I get lost, my legs will help me run and find the nearest donut shop."
"The only time I set the bar low is for limbo."
"Running late is my cardio."
"I thought I was in shape. Then I realized I was just really good at sitting down."
"I don’t run to add days to my life. I run to add life to my days."
"I work out because I love my body. I also work out because I love dessert."
"If you still look good at the end of your workout, you didn’t train hard enough."
"Running is a mental sport, and we're all insane."
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"
"I have a great body, but it's in a different area code."
"I could exercise, but it makes me tired."
"If you want to look thin, you can’t eat."
"The gym is a place where you can get a great workout without seeing anyone you know."
"Cardio? Is that a type of edible?"
"Running will not only make you a better athlete, it will make you a better person. But I still don’t like it."
"I'm just here to avoid drama and eat pizza. Oh, and cardio."
"Exercising would be really fun if it weren’t for all the working out."
"I do marathons… on Netflix."
"Some people dream of success, while others wake up and work hard at the gym. I just dream of tacos."
"Aging is inevitable, but lifting weights is optional. Yet, I'll stick to my snacks!"
"If running were a defense mechanism, I'd be a pro."
"I don't sweat, I sparkle!"
"I’m in shape, round is a shape."
"Some people are made to lift weights; I'm made to lift burgers."
"Every time I start a workout, I think about how much I’d rather be laying in bed."
"The only time I run is when I’m being chased."
"I don’t jog. If I was meant to jog, I’d have a faster body."
"Running: cheaper than therapy."
"I run because I really, really like dessert."
"I’m not a runner, I’m a jogger who just hasn’t realized it yet."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch."
"I run like the winded."
"If I see you running, I’ll assume something is chasing you."
"Sweating like a sinner in church."
"I have a new exercise routine: I call it ‘jogging in place’… while sitting."
"I like long walks, especially when they are taken by people who annoy me."
"Running is a mental sport... and we’re all insane."
"The only marathon I’m training for is a binge-watching marathon."
"I didn’t choose the thug life. The thug life chose me... but I’m still not running."
"Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!"
"Running late counts as cardio, right?"
"If running scared burns calories, then I’m a lean machine!"
"I'm in shape... Round is a shape!"
"Why run a mile when you can take a nap?"
"The only thing I run is a nap."
"I’m not running, I’m just running away from my responsibilities."
"I love my job only when I’m on vacation. But I’ll still run to get ice cream."
"Training for a marathon and loving every step of the way—especially the part where I quit."
"Running gives you a clear mind... unless you’re trying to remember where you parked."
"I ran my first marathon. I won a medal for finishing—too bad it was for the snacks afterwards."
"Cardio? I thought you said 'car-do.'"
"I run primarily to chase down the ice cream truck."
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