109 result(s) for Funny Garden Quotes.
"I love gardening, and I love to garden. Gardening is medicine that does not need a prescription. It is a natural herbal remedy that will heal your body, mind, and spirit."
"Gardeners are the only people who are kind of like the song 'Always Look on the Bright Side of Life' while digging a hole."
"If I had a garden, I'd probably spend all my time trying to keep it alive. However, I seem to have a talent for killing plants..."
"I have a fear of gardening. I've been through many shovels and hoes, and they've all turned into a Nightmare on Elm Street."
"To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow, especially if you're planting vegetables and you don't know what you're doing."
"Why do we plant a seed? Because there’s nothing like the satisfaction of watching something grow... and weeding it terribly."
"Weeds are like sex in high school: they just keep coming back. No matter how much you try to get rid of them."
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"My neighbors think I'm a lunatic. I've been talking to my plants. It's nothing personal; I just want them to grow up to be good underachievers."
"A weed is but an unloved flower. They could be friends if I didn't have to remove them."
"Gardening: the only time I allow myself to be corrupted by dirt."
"I can’t seem to find my gardening gloves. They must be in the garden, hiding from me."
"Eating a vegetable is the equivalent of hugging a tree."
"Some of my best friends are weeds. They’re such good listeners."
"Planting a seed is a great way to express hope—if you're a perennial optimist. Otherwise, it’s just a tragic tale of neglect."
"I'm a gardening fanatic. I like to call it seed therapy. In fact, one day you're feeling hot and heavy, and the next day you're just in soil."
"The flower is the most beautiful thing in the world, but just like a bad haircut, it will eventually bloom again."
"I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised. I told her not to take it too seriously; she can always plant flowers instead."
"Gardening is a way of showing that you believe in tomorrow... or at least in next week's watering schedule."
"If flowers can grow through concrete, then you can grow through whatever you’re facing."
"He that plants thorns must never expect to gather roses."
"I can’t plant flowers. They’re like little green marbles that are too demanding."
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"The only thing I can grow is my debt. I guess that makes me a gardener of bad financial decisions."
"Gardening is cheaper than therapy; and you get tomatoes."
"The best fertilizer is the gardener's shadow... but too much and it can lead to some serious browning!"
"I love gardening. It’s a great workout and it makes you feel like you’ve done something real."
"The grass is always greener where you water it."
"Vegetables are a must on a diet. I suggest carrot cake, zucchini bread, and pumpkin pie."
"Plant seeds of happiness, hope, success, and love; it will all come back to you in abundance."
"I have no idea how to garden, but I'm going to try to plant some stuff. It's really just about digging a hole and putting something in it, right?"
"I think I shall never see a poem lovely as a tree. I love trees!"
"In the garden, my soul is sunshine."
"Why do plants always look so tired? Because they are constantly in the 'flora' of their lives!"
"I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day. And when it’s cold outside, I’ve got the month of May!"
"Lettuce turnip the beet!"
"My garden is my favorite place to be. It’s my place to escape the world, until it tells me to weed it."
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"Flowers are the music of the ground. From earth’s lips they speak."
"A garden is a grand teacher. It teaches patience and carefulness; it teaches industry and thrift; above all, it teaches entire faith."
"The gardener only plants the seeds; it is the planet that makes them grow."
"You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy plants, and that’s kind of the same thing."
"My gardening philosophy is to be relaxed and love the weeds."
"If you think gardening is a hard work, you haven't grown enough weeds."
"Gardening is cheaper than therapy, and you get tomatoes."
"I plant a lot of seeds because I'm not sure which ones will grow. It's like parenting."
"The best time to plant a tree was twenty years ago. The second best time is now."
"Gardening: cheaper than therapy and a lot more fun."
"When in doubt, plant a plant."
"I think the only time I’m really happy is when I’m in my garden."
"A garden is a reflection of the gardener—the messier the garden, the messier the gardener."
"Why do we plant flowers? For the birds and the bees! And for the gardener’s sanity!"
"Gardening adds years to your life and life to your years."
"If you want to be happy for a lifetime, plant a garden."
"Weeds are flowers too, once you get to know them."
"Every time I plant a seed, I'm teaching patience."
"Life is a garden—dig it!"
"Gardening is a matter of your enthusiasm holding up until your back gets used to it."
"If you want to keep a secret, plant a garden."
"In my garden, I celebrate all that comes up."
"Don't wait for someone to bring you flowers. Plant your own garden and decorate your own soul."
"The garden suggests there might be a place where we can meet nature halfway."
"Gardening is both an act of nurturing and a form of rebellion."
"I’ve never met a plant I didn’t like. Some just need a little more love."
"The garden is the most beautiful poetry of the earth."
"I love gardening. It's a place where I find myself when I lose myself."
"To plant a garden is to believe in tomorrow."
"We can be heroes, just for one day. Well, at least we can be gardeners."
"I have a green thumb, but I also have a black thumb. I need to hire a gardener."
"A weed is a plant that has mastered every survival skill except for gardening."
"Gardeners are good at nurturing, and they also know what it feels like to be both a protector and a victim."
"If you want to be happy for a year, plant a garden; if you want to be happy for life, plant a tree."
"I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already."
"I grow plants for many reasons: for food, for beauty, for a sense of achievement."
"Gardening is the art that uses flowers and plants as paint, and the soil and sky as canvas."
"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second best time is now."
"I don’t have a green thumb, I have a brown thumb and a black thumb!"
"Gardeners see beauty in the weeds as well as the flowers."
"In every gardener, there is a child who believes in The Seed Fairy."
"Gardening is like sex. You never forget the first time."
"If you think gardening is a chore, you are not doing it right."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch."
"Gardening: where you can respect nature, yet reject the weeds."
"Planting a garden is like putting a smile on your face."
"The flowers of tomorrow are the seeds of today."
"A weed is but an unloved flower."
"Gardening requires lots of water, most of it in the form of perspiration."
"If you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need."
"Gardening is the purest of human pleasures."
"I can’t believe I’m saying this, but I think I’m growing fond of weeds."
"Life begins the day you start a garden."
"The best time to plant a tree was 20 years ago. The second-best time is now."
"We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorns have roses."
"I like gardening — it’s a place where I find myself when I need to lose myself."
"My garden is my most beautiful masterpiece."
"Happiness is the smell of a new book and the smell of dirt."
"There are no gardening mistakes, only experiments."
"Plant smiles, grow laughter, harvest love."
"A garden is a friend you can visit any time."
"The garden that is not watered will not grow."
"You know you're a gardener when you ask someone to weed your flower bed as a favor."
"Why did the gardener plant a light bulb? He wanted to grow a power plant!"
"I can't believe I actually have to do my own weeding now."
"Old gardeners never die, they just pot away."
"Why do gardeners make terrible musicians? Because they can't find the right pitch!"
"Gardeners know all the dirt!"
"I love my garden. It’s my workout area, relaxation area, and kitchen."
"If you're not supposed to eat midnight snacks, why is there even light in the fridge?"
"Gardening is cheaper than therapy and you get tomatoes."
"The secret to a green thumb is a good pair of gloves."
"There’s no ‘we’ in garden. It’s ‘I’ in garden."
"And the flower bloomed in the joy of living."
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