Memorable Weird Quotes

116 result(s) for Weird Quotes.
"I believe in accidents. I think they can be a gift from the universe."
David Bowie
"I find television very educating. Every time somebody turns on the set, I go into the other room and read a book."
Groucho Marx
"If you think you are too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito."
Betty Reese
"The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets."
Al McGuire
"Two wrongs don't make a right, but three rights make a left."
Unknown
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender."
Rodney Dangerfield
"The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem."
Theodore I. Rubin
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"I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure."
Unknown
"I think it’s wrong that only one company makes the game Monopoly."
Steven Wright
"Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans."
John Lennon
"My fake plants died because I did not water them."
Mitch Hedberg
"When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane."
Unknown
"I am on the patch of ground that I am master of."
Walt Whitman
"You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?"
Steven Wright
"I'm a nobody, and nobody is perfect. Therefore, I'm perfect."
Unknown
"Where there's a will, there's a relative."
Unknown
"I don’t mind that you think I’m weird. I embrace weirdness. In fact, if you think I’m weird, I probably think you’re weird too."
John Waters
"Weirdness is not a disability. It’s a mental condition."
David E. Kelley
"Weird is a side effect of awesome."
Unknown
"It's not that I'm so smart, it's just that I stay with problems longer."
Albert Einstein
"Life is too important to be taken seriously."
Oscar Wilde
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"Normality is a paved road: It's comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow."
Vincent Van Gogh
"If you’re not a little weird, you’re probably boring."
Unknown
"Weird people are the most interesting people."
Unknown
"You don’t have to be crazy to be my friend. I’ll train you."
Unknown
"The only difference between me and a madman is that I’m not mad."
Salvador Dalí
"Be yourself; everyone else is already taken."
Oscar Wilde
"The great thing about being a writer is that you can make up whatever you want, and it's completely acceptable."
Anne Rice
"Your weirdness is your greatest asset."
Unknown
"The more weird you are, the more fun you are."
Unknown
"I think I am a loser. But that's okay, because, unlike many, I know it."
Ricky Gervais
"We are all made of stardust."
Carl Sagan
"I have never been misunderstood and I remain unfamiliar with the nature of reality."
David Bowie
"Being perfectly well-adjusted is a sign of a misspent life."
Sigmund Freud
"I like people who are a little bit crazy. I think they're magical."
Unknown
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"Normal is an illusion. What is normal for the spider is chaos for the fly."
Morticia Addams
"Weird is a badge of honor."
Unknown
"I am an invisible man... I am a man of substance, of flesh and bone, fiber and liquids—and I might even be said to possess a mind."
Ralph Ellison
"Here’s to the crazy ones. The misfits. The rebels. The troublemakers. The round pegs in the square holes."
Steve Jobs
"I don't know if I am a madman or not. I am a man with an idea."
Gustave Flaubert
"I live in my own little world. But it's okay; they know me here."
Lauren Myracle
"I don't know the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone."
Bill Cosby
"If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you."
Steven Wright
"The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
Steven Wright
"If you think you're too small to be effective, you have never been in bed with a mosquito."
Betty Reese
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
Thomas Edison
"Weird is just a side effect of awesome."
Anonymous
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"
Robin Williams
"A bank is a place that will lend you money if you can prove that you don't need it."
Bob Hope
"I sometimes cover my ears with my hands and let out a loud scream just to calm myself down."
Anonymous
"I'm on the patch, or as I like to call it, the 'Don't Try This at Home' patch."
Anonymous
"I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me beach photos."
Anonymous
"I used to have a handle on life, but then it broke."
Anonymous
"Never trust a computer you can't throw out a window."
Steve Wozniak
"I would challenge you to a battle of wits, but I see you are unarmed."
Anonymous
"Out of my mind. Back in five minutes."
Anonymous
"If I had a dollar for every time I had a nickel, I'd be a millionaire."
Anonymous
"I'm not insane. My reality is just different from yours."
Anonymous
"I'm not arguing. I'm just explaining why I'm right."
Anonymous
"Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice."
Anonymous
"The problem with candy is that it makes you feel great until it doesn’t."
Anonymous
"I finally found the nerve to say, 'I don't want to do this anymore.' So now I'm sitting in a car, going nowhere, and it's nice."
Anonymous
"At my age, I've seen it all, done it all, heard it all. I just can't remember it all."
Anonymous
"I started with nothing and now I have a whole lot of nothing."
Anonymous
"I’m not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."
Michael Scott
"The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
Jeremy Paxman
"I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already."
Tommy Cooper
"If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of payments."
Earl Wilson
"I don’t want to achieve immortality through my work. I want to achieve it through not dying."
Woody Allen
"I used to think I was indecisive, but now I'm not too sure."
Unknown
"The only thing we have to fear is fear itself… and spiders."
Franklin D. Roosevelt (paraphrased)
"I am free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally."
W.C. Fields
"A day without laughter is a day wasted."
Charlie Chaplin
"I can resist anything except temptation."
Oscar Wilde
"Behind every great man, there is a woman rolling her eyes."
Jim Carrey
"I have an existential crisis every morning."
Unknown
"The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces."
Will Rogers
"Adults are just kids with money."
Paul Dhinakaran
"I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong."
Benjamin Franklin
"If at first you don’t succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried."
Unknown
"If you can't convince them, confuse them."
Harry S. Truman
"I’d explain it to you, but your brain would explode."
Unknown
"I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."
Unknown
"Why don't you just go home and be a family man?"
The Big Lebowski
"I told my therapist about my procrastination issues. We had to reschedule."
Unknown
"The problem with trouble is, it starts out as fun."
Anonymous
"If you think that you have low self-esteem, you probably have low self-esteem."
Unknown
"A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory."
Steven Wright
"Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense."
Unknown
"I am so clever that sometimes I don't understand a single word of what I am saying."
Oscar Wilde
"Sometimes I wonder whether the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on or by imbeciles who really mean it."
Mark Twain
"I think the world is weird, but I think that is part of the beauty of it."
Jesse Jackson
"I never trust people who smile constantly. They’re either selling something or not very bright."
Larry Elder
"Weird is good. Bad is bad. But weird is a gift."
Tommy Wiseau
"I'm not weird, I'm just limited edition."
Unknown
"Normality is a paved road: It's comfortable to walk, but no flowers grow on it."
Vincent Van Gogh
"I am not strange, I am just not normal."
Salvador Dalí
"The only thing worse than being weird is being boring."
Trent Reznor
"The truth is rarely pure and never simple."
Oscar Wilde
"You have to be a little weird to find the weirdness in others."
Bruce Vilanch
"I used to be normal. Then I got bored."
Unknown
"Weird people are the best people."
Dr. Seuss
"Being weird is like being a superhero. You have to own it."
Unknown
"You’re only given a little spark of madness. You mustn’t lose it."
Robin Williams
"Normality is a fine ideal but it’s a bit of a bore."
Robert K. Merton
"If you're not a little bit weird, you're not being real."
Unknown
"The weirder you are, the more people will notice you."
Unknown
"Some people just need a high-five. In the face. With a chair."
Unknown
"Why fit in when you were born to stand out?"
Dr. Seuss
"Everyone is weird. Some people are just better at hiding it."
Unknown
"There's a fine line between stupid and clever."
Derek Jacobi
"The world is full of people who are desperately trying to be normal."
Drew Barrymore
"Normal is not something to aspire to, it’s something to get away from."
Jodie Foster
"In a world full of trends, I want to remain a classic."
Iris Apfel
"It’s a weird world."
Joni Mitchell
"We’re all a little weird. And when we find others who are as weird as we are, we join up with them and fall into mutual weirdness and call it love."
Dr. Seuss
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