Memorable Funny Wrestling Quotes

129 result(s) for Funny Wrestling Quotes.
"I'm going to put my heart and soul into this match, and probably my knee into their face."
John Cena
"When the dust settles and the smoke clears, you will see that I’m the only one standing."
Undertaker
"I’m a great worker because I can make you believe the story. If the story’s good, I can wrestle a broom."
Ricky Steamboat
"I don't sweat - I sparkle!"
Charlotte Flair
"Every time we get on the plane, we look at each other and say, 'Well, we’ve survived another one.'"
Shawn Michaels
"My back is just like a training bra. It only holds two cups."
Mick Foley
"If you don’t like what I’m doing, that just makes me want to do it more."
The Miz
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"You’re calling me a loser? I’m the guy that can’t lose!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"If you smell what The Rock is cooking, it better be good!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"I’ll drop you with a little respect!"
Eddie Guerrero
"Sometimes you have to give up your image to become the man."
Chris Jericho
"Don't call me a dreamer. I’m a doer!"
Edge
"I’m not an athlete. I’m a performer."
David Arquette
"You can't spell big without 'I'!"
Jesse Ventura
"The only thing better than winning is winning with style!"
Ric Flair
"I am the best in the world at what I do!"
CM Punk
"My goal is to make my opponent think there’s no way out."
Stone Cold Steve Austin
"I’m just a big kid in a sandbox."
Kurt Angle
"I don't walk into the ring. I stride."
Bret Hart
"Proud to be the ugly duckling of wrestling."
Daniel Bryan
"I'm a wrestling superstar. I can make anything work."
Vince McMahon
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"You can’t stop the reign!"
Roman Reigns
"I carry the weight of the world on my back, and I do it with a smile."
Sasha Banks
"I'm not an enigma. I'm a miracle!"
Matt Hardy
"I have more charisma in my little finger than most wrestlers have in their whole bodies."
Shane McMahon
"The fans pay for their ticket, and I pay their dues!"
Kane
"I’ve got a cup of coffee in one hand and a ladder in the other. I think I’m going to take a long break."
Mick Foley
"You know, I don’t think anybody ever made me laugh harder than Vince McMahon."
Stone Cold Steve Austin
"You can’t trust anyone in this business, especially me."
Randy Orton
"I just want you to know that I’m going to be the very best, just like everyone else."
John Cena
"I didn’t have a father growing up. I had a father growing down."
Triple H
"I think we’re in a bit of a pickle now."
Jerry Lawler
"If you smell what The Rock is cooking!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"When life gives you lemonade, make lemons. Life will be all like, 'What?!'"
Cactus Jack (Mick Foley)
"I’m not just a wrestler; I’m an entertainer. And the show must go on!"
Shawn Michaels
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"I’m not saying I’m the best at what I do; I’m just saying you’ll never see anyone better at what I do than me."
Chris Jericho
"I’m really a nice guy, I just happen to enjoy being a lunatic."
Dean Ambrose
"I always wonder why birds choose to stay in the same place when they can fly anywhere on Earth. Then I ask myself the same question."
Kurt Angle
"I’m not just the best; I’m also the prettiest."
Ric Flair
"I always tell people I’m a purist, because I can’t spell 'sophisticated'."
Eddie Guerrero
"Wrestling is like chess, only with violence and no restrictions on the number of pawns one can have."
Lance Storm
"I can’t tell you the key to success, but the key to failure is trying to please everyone."
Mr. Perfect (Curt Hennig)
"You’ve got a problem with me? Well, I’ve got a problem with you, too!"
CM Punk
"Wrestling is not just a sport; it’s a way to resolve conflicts with body slams."
Jim Cornette
"If you can’t win, make it funny!"
Kofi Kingston
"I told myself I would never event or retire from wrestling. But then again, I never expected to get addicted to comedy, either."
Road Dogg
"Winning isn’t everything, but it sure beats losing!"
Paul Heyman
"The only thing better than winning is making a joke about it later."
Billy Gunn
"To be honest, I never wanted to be a wrestler. Then I realized I could make a lot of money for getting hurt."
Terry Funk
"I find it ironic that I’m a gimmick performer, when I can’t even remember what I had for breakfast."
Goldust
"I’m not a bad guy. I’m a good guy who sometimes does bad things."
Rob Van Dam
"Life is too short to be serious all the time. If you can't laugh at yourself, call me and I will!"
James Ellsworth
"It's not the size of the dog in the fight; it's the size of the fight in the dog."
Mark Twain
"If you're going to be dumb, you gotta be tough."
Jessie Ventura
"I’m not a pretty guy. I’m a weird looking dude. But I’m pretty damn good at what I do."
Mick Foley
"You don’t have to be a jerk to be successful in this business. But it sure helps!"
Vince McMahon
"I’m the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be."
Bret Hart
"Some say I’m a little over the top. You know what? I’ll always be over the top!"
Ric Flair
"I love to see your face light up when you lose!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"When someone asks you to take a picture, show them what you got!"
Kane
"I was the best in the world at what I did. They didn’t call me the best without reason."
CM Punk
"If I can’t make you laugh, I’ll make you cry. It’s win-win!"
Mick Foley
"We’re all the same. Just different weight classes."
Ric Flair
"I've been in the ring with some of the best wrestlers in the world. And I can assure you, I've come out on top with my charisma."
Eddie Guerrero
"I have huge muscles, and I’m very humble about it!"
John Cena
"You can’t learn anything when you’re talking."
Baron Corbin
"I know I’m a good friend. But I'll be a better enemy!"
Paul Heyman
"Don’t be like a leaf in the wind, be like a rock in the river."
Stone Cold Steve Austin
"I don’t tan, I just burn really bright!"
Chris Jericho
"Continuous improvement is better than delayed perfection."
The Miz
"I’m like a fine wine, I get better with age. And by ‘fine wine’ I mean really cheap wine!"
Jeff Hardy
"The only thing I’ve got a problem with is that I’m pretty sure I’ve been doing this all wrong!"
Santino Marella
"I’m not a role model. I’m just a guy who knows how to sell a few t-shirts!"
Stone Cold Steve Austin
"I’m here to do what I do best, and that’s to entertain you."
Dolph Ziggler
"Eat, Sleep, Wrestle, Repeat! You know, in that order."
Finn Balor
"In the ring, there are days when you’re the dog and days when you’re the fire hydrant!"
Cactus Jack
"I’m not a bad guy. I’m not a good guy. I’m The Guy."
Roman Reigns
"The only thing I’m guilty of is being awesome!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"You gotta be a little crazy to be a pro wrestler."
Dusty Rhodes
"If you can’t keep up with my pace, you’ll think you’re in a race."
Shawn Michaels
"I am the table!"
Paul Heyman
"I’m gonna take you down to Funkytown."
Brodus Clay
"I used to be a friggin' savage!"
Mick Foley
"It doesn’t matter what you think!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"I don't even like the term 'pro wrestler' because it's underneath what we do."
Triple H
"Wrestling is not a sport, it's a way of life!"
Stone Cold Steve Austin
"The more I sweat in peace, the less I bleed in war."
Mark Henry
"You’ll never see the back of my hand!"
Sasha Banks
"At the end of the day, I’m just a guy who sits at home and watches wrestling."
Chris Jericho
"I am the best in the world at what I do."
CM Punk
"If you smell what The Rock is cookin'!"
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"Don’t mess with the best or you’re gonna get the horns!"
Kurt Angle
"This is for all you fat, out-of-shape, wannabe wrestlers!"
Vince McMahon
"I’m the boss, I’m the beast, I’m the best!"
Brock Lesnar
"Winning is a habit, so is losing."
Vince Lombardi
"You don’t get what you deserve; you get what you work for."
Mark Henry
"There’s a difference between a winner and a loser, and that would be me."
The Miz
"In the ring, I am a shark. Outside the ring, I’m a puppy."
AJ Styles
"I have a bigger ego than my bank account."
Ric Flair
"You can't be a champion unless you've got a little bit of charisma!"
Ravishing Rick Rude
"I’m not just a wrestler; I’m an attraction!"
Braun Strowman
"Wrestling is a dance with a punch."
Jesse Ventura
"The only thing softer than John Cena's body is his political stance."
Dwayne 'The Rock' Johnson
"It’s not just a show. It’s a show of shows. And I am the star of the show."
Vince McMahon
"I’m a sucker for a dramatic entrance. The more ridiculous the better!"
Chris Jericho
"You can’t polish a turd, but you can roll it in glitter!"
Terry Funk
"Sometimes you have to break the rules to set things right. Or at least get a laugh."
Mick Foley
"If you can’t beat them, make them laugh."
Stone Cold Steve Austin
"I’m not a bad guy. I’m not a good guy. I’m just a funny guy."
Roman Reigns
"He’s like a kid in a candy store. A candy store full of bad decisions."
Jim Ross
"When in doubt, just add more glitter."
Lita
"The only thing I love more than a good fight is a good laugh."
Bret Hart
"Wrestling is like a buffet. You’ll love some, hate some, but you always go back for more."
Randy Orton
"I've got an idea that’s just crazy enough to be a really bad one."
Jeff Hardy
"I didn’t come here to play it safe. I came here to make bad decisions!"
Cody Rhodes
"The best part about wrestling? The hairdos. No question."
Goldust
"This business is like a joke; if you're not laughing, you need to change your punchline."
Kevin Owens
"You can't script a good time! But we sure can try!"
Kurt Angle
"Life is a stage and I’m the laughing stock of it all."
Bray Wyatt
"I’m a big fan of the 'Oops' move. It's hilarious every single time."
Mr. T
"You want to know how to sell? Just watch me trip over my own feet."
Big Show
"Just because my arm is in a sling doesn’t mean I can’t still throw shade."
AJ Styles
"Comedy is a serious business. Not as serious as wrestling, but serious nonetheless."
Vince Russo
"They told me to break a leg. So I did... and then I got a title shot."
Daniel Bryan
"Think of life as a wrestling match; try not to get pinned."
Shawn Michaels
"Laughing uncontrollably is better than losing."
Sasha Banks
"If I trip and fall in the ring, I prefer it to be while telling a joke."
Lacey Evans
"Remember, wrestling is 90% acting and 10% falling on your face."
Luke Harper
"The best comedy is when you make a fool of yourself with flair."
Ric Flair
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