25 result(s) for Funny Showering Quotes.
"I love being in the shower, because that's where I have all my good ideas."
"I do some of my best thinking while sitting on the toilet or in the shower."
"Everybody has won, and all must have prizes."
"Sometimes I think I understand everything, then I regain consciousness."
"Why is it that showers are perfect for crying?"
"I always say shopping is cheaper than a psychiatrist."
"Sometimes, I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up that's the best they're going to feel all day."
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"I hate when I lose things at home. I'm like, 'Well, I'm not going to retrace my steps. I'm not Sherlock Holmes over here.'"
"The only mystery in life is why the kamikaze pilots wore helmets."
"I am an early bird and a night owl... so I am wise and I have worms."
"There's a fine line between genius and insanity. I have erased this line."
"I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me, and the second one didn't."
"If you don't know where you are going, you might wind up someplace else."
"I used to sell furniture for a living. The trouble was, it was my own."
"I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them."
"I intend to live forever, or die trying."
"It's not hard to meet expenses. They're everywhere."
"I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me."
"My therapist told me the way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far today, I have finished 2 bags of chips and a chocolate cake. I feel better already."
"I always wanted to be somebody, but now I realize I should have been more specific."
"My doctor told me to stop having intimate dinners for four. Unless there are three other people."
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"I have learned from my mistakes, and I am sure I can repeat them exactly."
"The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
"I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious."
"I'm not sure what is harder on an actor: the wait on set, or waiting for people to recognize you in public."
