114 result(s) for Funny Restaurant Quotes.
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."
"We can’t be friends because you vote for arugula."
"I would give up chocolate, but I’m no quitter."
"I’m full of chocolate and I’m hungry for more."
"I can’t eat just one potato chip. I need a whole bag!"
"A balanced diet is having a cupcake in each hand."
"You can't make everyone happy. You're not pizza."
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"Food is my love language."
"If you really want to make a friend, go to their house and eat with them. The people who give you their food give you their heart."
"I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge."
"Life is too short. Eat dessert first."
"They say laughter is the best medicine, but in my opinion, it’s pizza."
"There's no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap."
"I’m just a big fan of food. You don’t need fancy food; just good food."
"Good food is good mood."
"You better cut the pizza in four pieces because I’m not hungry enough to eat six."
"I eat food, like, every day, you know?"
"I love people who make me laugh. I honestly think it’s the thing I like most, to laugh. It cures a multitude of ills."
"My kitchen is a mess because I use it too much and because I’m too busy cooking to clean it."
"In the end, all you need is love. But a little chocolate now and then doesn’t hurt."
"Life is short, eat the cake."
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"I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised."
"I hate when I'm singing a song and the artist gets distracted and stops singing."
"There’s no better feeling than a warm pizza box on your lap."
"People who love to eat are always the best people."
"I'm not a vegetarian because I love animals; I'm a vegetarian because I hate plants."
"I could give up chocolate, but I'm not a quitter."
"Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese."
"I'm on a whiskey diet. I've lost three days already."
"I just love it when people argue about food. You can tell a lot about a person by what they eat."
"I never met a taco I didn’t like."
"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."
"Wine is constant proof that God loves us and loves to see us happy."
"Let food be thy medicine and medicine be thy food."
"I’m just a girl, standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
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"Food brings us together."
"I love pizza. I want to marry it, but it would just be a friendship."
"Good food is the foundation of genuine happiness."
"I am on the patch right now, and I’m trying to quit. It’s been three days since I’ve had a Crème Brûlée. That’s the only dessert I can’t stop eating. I can give up every other dessert, but I love Crème Brûlée."
"The four food groups are chocolate, candies, nuts, and water."
"I'm on seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it."
"I love to cook with wine. Sometimes I even put it in the food."
"Life is too short to eat bland food."
"I didn't choose the thug life. The thug life chose me. I do, however, choose the cheese fries."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch."
"You can't make everybody happy. You're not pizza."
"The only time to be positive you suck is when you’re being negative."
"I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge."
"Brunch without champagne is just a sad breakfast."
"You don’t need a silver fork to eat good food."
"If you can't stand the heat, get out of the kitchen."
"Eat food, not much, mostly plants."
"Cooks are a different breed; they live in the kitchen."
"I’m in a love affair with food."
"A balanced diet means a cupcake in each hand."
"Life is uncertain. Eat dessert first."
"You can't make everyone happy. You're not a taco."
"Stressed, blessed, and coffee obsessed."
"I'm just a girl, standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"Sushi. The only time it’s appropriate to roll your food."
"I’m not a vegetarian because I love animals; I’m a vegetarian because I hate plants."
"There’s no we in fries."
"If you're afraid of butter, use cream."
"I was on a diet, but I just got so hungry."
"There’s no better feeling in the world than a warm pizza box on your lap."
"I don’t eat fast food; I eat pizza."
"I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time'. So I ordered French toast during the Renaissance."
"My therapist told me a way to achieve true inner peace is to finish what I start. So far I’ve finished two bags of M&M’s and a cheesecake."
"You can't buy happiness, but you can buy pizza, and that's kind of the same thing."
"I've been on a diet for two weeks, and all I've lost is two weeks."
"Food is an important part of a balanced diet."
"I love cats, but I can't eat a whole one."
"If you want to impress someone, just order dessert."
"The only thing I like better than talking about food is eating."
"I don’t trust anyone who doesn’t like pizza."
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."
"The man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way."
"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."
"Life is too short for bad coffee."
"You know what they say: the more you weigh, the harder you are to kidnap."
"I love food, I love eating. And I’m not ashamed."
"Eating is a necessity, but cooking is an art."
"Cooking is like love. It should be entered into with abandon or not at all."
"Good food is all the sweeter when shared with good friends."
"I love the smell of bacon in the morning."
"Eat well, travel often."
"I just want to eat my pizza in peace."
"Nothing brings people together like good food."
"In wine, there is truth. In food, there is life."
"The only time to be positive you have a clear path is when you’re on the edge of a cliff."
"I went to a restaurant that serves 'breakfast at any time.' So I ordered French Toast during the Renaissance."
"I love pressing wildflowers in my restaurant. It's a thorny issue, but it really adds a floral aroma!"
"I like diners, but I don’t like breakfast after 4 PM. Can’t we just call it ‘the meal we’re about to serve you'?"
"I asked the waiter for a glass of water, and he said, 'Why? You can't put a price on thirst.' So I paid for the tap."
"I can't wait for this restaurant to open. It's going to have so much character, the chairs will be jealous."
"A restaurant is a place where you can enjoy your food while complaining about it to someone else."
"I went to a restaurant called The 'Wrong Way.' They said it was hard to find... you must always approach it from the left."
"The only thing worse than a bad meal is a bad meal with friends."
"I told my waiter I wanted a hot drink, so he brought me a cup of coffee with a side of sarcasm."
"I ordered a chicken and an egg from the menu, and for once, I was stumped."
"This restaurant is so good, it's like I can taste the love... along with the butter."
"I proposed at a restaurant, and now we have two servings of love on the menu."
"I have a restaurant that serves breakfast only, but we don't open until noon. Catching up on sleep counts as a meal, right?"
"Do you want to hear a joke about a restaurant? Sorry, I’m not good at delivery."
"A good restaurant is like a good garden; it grows on what you feed it."
"I told my friend I was tired of waiting in lines at restaurants. He said, 'You should just go. It’s called lunch, not lunch line.'"
"I once asked the chef for a menu item. He said, 'Sorry, that’s off the menu.' I replied, 'What's on my plate then?'"
"This restaurant's food was so good, I almost forgot my manners... but only almost."
"I made a reservation for two, and the waiter asked if I meant at the table or in the kitchen."
"Why don’t restaurants ever tell you what the secret recipes are? Because they know it will ruin the menu!"
"Eating at a restaurant is like going to a concert: it's all about the experience and the good vibes."
"The food at this restaurant is so good, it should have a fan club."
"A restaurant without dessert is like a party without cake. It’s just not the same."
"I finally found a restaurant that serves my favorite food. I can't say it was love at first bite... but it was pretty close."
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