105 result(s) for Funny Women’s T-Shirt Quotes.
"I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won’t stop sending me beach photos."
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch... I call it lunch."
"I'm not a hot mess. I'm a spicy disaster."
"Run like you're being chased by the Kardashians."
"Dear Diet, it’s not you, it’s me. I just don’t think we can work it out."
"I need six months of vacation, twice a year."
"I'm not short, I'm fun size!"
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"I may be a handful, but that’s why you’ve got two hands."
"If you can't laugh at yourself, I'll gladly do it for you."
"I followed my heart, and it led me to the fridge."
"I’m an aquaholic. Just add water!"
"Too glam to give a damn!"
"I thought I wanted a career, turns out I just wanted paychecks."
"Sweatpants are my favorite pants."
"THERE’S A 99% CHANCE I’M GOING TO EAT THIS."
"Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth."
"Be a voice, not an echo."
"I’m like a butterfly: pretty to see, hard to catch."
"I told my therapist about my crush on Justin Bieber. He said, 'You need to let it go.' I said, 'I don’t have a problem. I have a therapy bill!'"
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food, and I eat it."
"I don't need Google. My husband knows everything."
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"I'm not a regular mom, I'm a cool mom!"
"I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure."
"I’m just a girl, standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"Sometimes I pretend to be normal. But it gets boring. So I go back to being me."
"I’m not always sarcastic. Sometimes I’m asleep."
"If I were funny, I would have a goodInstagram caption."
"I’m on my way to steal your heart… or your fries."
"Behind every successful woman is a basket of dirty laundry."
"Who runs the world? Squirrels!"
"I'm the reason I can't have nice things."
"I have a great personality! Just ask my mom."
"Can We Skip to the Part Where I Get a Pizza?"
"Sometimes I wish I were a kid again. Skipping school is way easier than raising kids!"
"I thought I was indecisive, but now I’m not too sure."
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"I’m on a whiskey diet. I’ve lost three days already."
"I'm on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."
"I followed my heart and it led me to the fridge."
"I’m just a girl... standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"Maybe I should just take a nap instead."
"I’m actually a mermaid."
"Procrastinators unite... tomorrow!"
"I’m on a wine diet. I’ve lost three days already."
"If I were a vegetable, I’d be a cute-cumber!"
"A day without laughter is a day wasted."
"I’m not lazy, I’m on energy-saving mode."
"Exercise? I thought you said extra fries!"
"You can’t make everybody happy, you’re not pizza."
"Running late is my cardio."
"I’m just here to avoid friends’ requests."
"I’d agree with you, but then we’d both be wrong."
"I’m not a regular mom, I’m a cool mom!"
"I'm not sure how many problems I have because math is one of them."
"Why fall in love when you can fall asleep?"
"I’m a unicorn in a world full of horses."
"Spreading positivity is my hobby."
"I might be a handful, but that’s why you’ve got two hands."
"Life isn’t perfect, but your outfit can be."
"Not today, Satan."
"If you think I’m crazy, you should meet my sister."
"I’m a ‘what if’ person in a ‘what now’ world."
"I’m not bossy, I just have better ideas."
"Raise your hand if you want to be my friend."
"In my defense, I was left unsupervised."
"I’m not short, I’m fun-sized!"
"I’m multitasking: I can listen, ignore and forget at the same time."
"I have a degree in sarcasm."
"I’m wearing black because it’s a happy color."
"I run on caffeine, chaos, and cuss words."
"Sassy since birth."
"Just another paper cut survival story."
"I came, I saw, I made it awkward."
"I can’t adult today; please don’t make me."
"Of course I talk to myself; sometimes I need expert advice."
"I told my computer I needed a break, and now it won't stop sending me beach wallpapers."
"Today’s mood: 100% caffeinated."
"My hobbies include eating and complaining that I’m getting fat."
"You can't make everyone happy. You're not a taco."
"I’m not arguing, I’m just explaining why I’m right."
"I told my therapist about you."
"I can’t adult today. Please don’t make me."
"I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it."
"I’m not short, I’m fun size!"
"My favorite exercise is a cross between a lunge and a crunch. I call it lunch."
"I’m not bossy. I just have better ideas."
"I’m just a girl standing in front of a salad, asking it to be a donut."
"If you think I’m crazy, you should meet my friends."
"Coffee: because adulting is hard."
"You can’t make everybody happy. You’re not a taco."
"I've learned that you can't please everyone, but a cupcake can come close."
"I’m not a morning person. Or a night person. There’s just a few hours in the afternoon where I’m not a monster."
"Sassy, classy, and a bit bad-assy."
"I’m not lazy, I’m just on energy-saving mode."
"I could give up shopping, but I’m not a quitter."
"Namast'ay in bed."
"I’m silently correcting your grammar."
"I did not choose the glam life, the glam life chose me."
"My brain has too many tabs open."
"Don’t make me use my teacher voice."
"If I were a fruit, I’d be a fine-apple."
"I’m a hot mess, and I’m okay with it."
"I’m here to avoid friends on Facebook."
"To me, beauty is about being comfortable in your own skin. That, or a kick-ass red lipstick."
"When nothing goes right, go left."
"I may be a handful, but that’s why you got two hands."
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