26 result(s) for Funny And Encouraging Quotes.
"Even if you're on the right track, you'll get run over if you just sit there."
"I am on my way to becoming a millionaire. At least I’m saving money on my antidepressants."
"The road to success is dotted with many tempting parking spaces."
"If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you."
"Don't worry if plan A doesn't work, there are 25 more letters in the alphabet."
"Life is short. Smile while you still have teeth."
"The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on."
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"Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired."
"I'm not arguing, I'm just explaining why I'm right."
"Don't take life too seriously. You'll never get out of it alive."
"A sarcastic person has a superiority complex that can be cured only by the honesty of humility."
"Always remember you’re unique, just like everyone else."
"My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We’ll see about that."
"The early bird might get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese."
"A day without laughter is a day wasted."
"Behind every great man, there is a woman rolling her eyes."
"I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender!"
"Why do they call it rush hour when nothing moves?"
"I used to be indecisive, but now I’m not so sure."
"I didn’t fail the test. I just found 100 ways to do it wrong."
"Age is of no importance unless you’re a cheese."
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"You can’t have everything. Where would you put it?"
"You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake."
"I’m in shape. Round is a shape!"
"The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up."
"I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something."
